Frequent
Fry Her TM
- LavenderButterfly/Posted: 19-NOV-04
My MIL is a control freak. My entire family is in
the US, while I live in the UK with my DH. So, this basically means
that my family is paying quite a bit more than my ILs are to come
to the event. Now, nothing about the wedding was the way that I wanted
it. This included the number of people that were invited, the food,
the flowers, everything. She's actually called me ungrateful, and
has gone behind my back to my DH to criticize and say that my mother
didn't pay for anything. As I pointed out to my DH when he brought
it up with me, "It wasn't the wedding that I wanted, so why should
my mother have paid a penny?" The point is that anytime anything
is brought up to my MIL that she's done wrong, it always turns into
a scene. She gets all emotional, and says that she "can't do
anything right" and that someone is always getting on to her.
There just is no speaking to her.
Frequent
Fry Her TM
- LavenderButterfly/Posted: 16-NOV-04
When my DH and I first got married, we had to stay
with his parents for a few months. It was a nightmare - a total
and complete nightmare. So, moving swiftly on, her cooking is
terrible. A meal is always served with something that is breaded
and fried, an overcooked vegetable and potatoes. Horrible, tasteless
food. One night, after a particularly long day at work, I took
one look at the plate in front of me that was totally filled all the
way to the edges, and rather than eat it to keep the peace, I just
ate what I could and threw the rest away. Now, you would have
thought that I had committed some horrible crime. She actually
shouted at me, calling me an idiot and so on. I didn't respond.
After all, it is her house. I stopped speaking to her totally.
I have nothing to say to her. And, she actually wonders why.
But, there really is no point in getting into it, as she always goes
into this massive pity party whenever someone says anything to her.
Frequent
Fry Her TM
- LavenderButterfly /Posted: 15-NOV-04
Up to this point, I haven't mentioned my DH much.
He avoids any and all confrontation with his mother. One day,
he was making a comment that indirectly involved my breasts, which
I'm very self conscious about, because they are small. He knows
this, and he cracked a joke when he shouldn't have. I told him
to cut it out. The next thing I knew, the MIL piped up with,
"DS, are you all right?" Then, she proceeded to go
on at me about how no one treats her children badly. I couldn't
believe it. She was interfering in my relationship with my DH
- something that is NONE of her business. DH did tell her, as
she prattled on, that he is not mistreated. But, in true style,
she didn't listen to him, and continued to go on.
Frequent
Fry Her TM
- LavenderButterfly /Posted: 14-NOV-04
Where should I start? I'll start with the wedding.
When I first met my FMIL, everything was great. She was so nice
to me. Then, once I became engaged to her DS, everything changed.
One night, after getting home from work, I got a phone call.
Now, this was in June and the wedding wasn't until November.
Anyhow, her first words were, "I've just baked your wedding cake!"
I paused, thinking of how not to offend her, and I couldn't help but
say, "Excuse me? It won't be any good by the time we get
married." To which she laughed and said, "No, it's
a fruitcake. Everyone loves my fruitcake." Except
me, the one who was actually getting married. I hate fruitcake.
And, to be quite frank, the thought of it makes me gag. What
I couldn't believe was that she made this decision by herself, without
consulting me. But, I thought, "OK, first time. I'll
let it slide and I'll somehow worm a sponge cake into the reception."
My biggest mistake! At the reception, my DH had to sneak bites
of my wedding cake to make it seem as if I were eating it. At
Christmas, she served a fruitcake and asked why I didn't eat the piece
that she gave me. I finally told her what I had been storing
up inside of me all of those months, "I don't like fruitcake.
Never have." Her response, "But you had it for your
wedding cake!" I sat up straighter, "You never asked.
You assumed and I never ate any of it." There's more oh
so much more, but that will be on other posts.
Signed - Desperately Wishing
For A MIL With A Clue
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