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Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
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Mother-In-Law Stories
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Frequent
Fry HerTM
Cat Woman
Age: 25 MIL Age: 62
Just the beginning ...
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Frequent
Fry Her TM - Catwoman
/Posted: 31-DEC-02
One final story for now - I'm sure there will be more
after the holiday get-togethers. If nothing else, I figure this
is a good forum for remembering the incidents as they occur.
That way, if this goes down a path that I am desperately trying to
prevent, then I have a way to remember and prove things without FH
being dismissive. Apparently, FH's family not being very warm
towards me is my fault. It is my fault, because I take time
when we are at FMIL's house to work on a crossword puzzle (for about
an hour, when we are there most of the day). I'm trying to use
the crossword puzzle as an attempt to get to know everyone and drag
them into conversation with me. The same crossword puzzle for
which I ask everyone for answers and get responses like, "I don't
know anything. But try BIL, he knows about racing cars."
What better way to find out about people's interests? FH's brother
gets all of the war history questions because that's his interest.
BIL gets sports and cars, etc., etc. I find it preferable to
sitting around and saying nothing because I can't participate in the
family conversations that they have. I haven't been around long
enough to be capable of being included in them. But, apparently,
they just view me as quiet. It was FSIL#2's opinion of me after
she met me for the first time over lunch, and I felt like I was carrying
a majority of the conversation at that lunch! Besides, FH does
the crossword on his own at my mother's house, so I asked him what
the difference was.
Signed - Hardly My Fault
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
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Frequent
Fry Her TM - Catwoman
/Posted: 31-DEC-02
As the wedding approaches, my FH gets phone calls at
work (of course) from his mother. The topic of conversation?
"So, SHE (meaning me) won't consider my church for the ceremony?"
Apparently, if its not the religious ceremony that she wants, then
it really doesn't count. But, at least it means that she recognizes
the fact that there is going to be a wedding. I'm not the same
religion as she is by any stretch of the imagination, and FH doesn't
believe either. So, I fail to see how this would be the preferable
choice. But, it is extremely important to her, and she pushes
the issue with all of her children. The conversation was bad
enough that FH said that he really wanted to tell her, "If you
don't like it, then don't come." I told him that it was
a good thing that he didn't, because if she's going tread down that
path, then let her take the first step instead of offering it to her.
I suggested to him that the next time she brings it up, he should
cut off the conversation with, "We've already made our decision
together." So, she's invited, and we are going to place
her at the table with my mother, a clergy member (of a different religion),
his wife, DF, and me! Incidentally, I'm not from the same church
as that clergyman either, but FH wanted a religious ceremony.
I wanted a JOP, and we compromised with this individual because of
his significance in my life.
Signed - Not Her Religion
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
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Frequent
Fry Her TM - Catwoman, 1 of
4 needed /Posted: 29-DEC-02
The second time that I met my FH's family it, unfortunately,
involved Christmas, and sitting through their gift exchange.
The first time was Thanksgiving. I was fully prepared to remain
an observer, as we had only been dating a few months. Apparently,
his mother decided that everyone should get me something small to
include me, which was very sweet. I just wish my FH had warned
me. The first gift presented to me was from one of his sisters
(who happens to be a very bitter individual, and who only shows up
at holiday gatherings so her kids can receive their gifts).
I responded with a surprised, yet heartfelt, "Oh, thank you,
you didn't have to do that," which I truly meant. As a
response I got, "Oh yes, I *did*!" With her tone of
voice she was very clearly stating that she had been told to purchase
something, and was very unhappy about it. I simply raised my
eyebrows, and let it go. I'm not looking forward to this year
either. FH is going to try to set up different ground rules
for Christmas this year, so we will see what happens. This is
not nearly as bad as other people have experienced, I know, but I'm
hoping this is not a sign of things to come. With everything
that I have read on this site, I will be doing my best to head off
things before they become worse than they have to be!
Signed - Not Expecting
Presents!
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
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Frequent
Fry Her TM - Catwoman, 2 of
4 needed /Posted: 29-DEC-02
The engagement happened, and we traveled out to FMIL's
house soon afterwards, since she started complaining that we *never*
come visit. Incidentally, she always calls DF at work, never
at home. So, he scheduled a date to go to her house. When
we arrived, she didn't even look up from what she was reading when
we walked in. No hello, no greeting. We greeted the other
family members, and, finally, she decided that she could begin talking
to us as well. At any point in time did she even remotely mention
the engagement, or the fact that she knew about it? Nope.
She spent quite a lot of time complaining about work, and how doctors
and other nurses don't know what they are doing, how the hospital
administrators are creating more work for her (she's an RN), etc.,
etc. This RN never impressed her son with the importance of
not eating foods that he is allergic to. I got my FH to start
removing these foods from his diet, and the change has been absolutely
incredible and wonderful. Every time we go there, she asks him
what symptoms of allergic reaction he was having because she doesn't
understand just how drastically it was affecting him. And, here
is the kicker - it is obvious that she is the one that he inherited
the allergies from!
Signed - Not An RN
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
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Frequent
Fry Her TM - Catwoman, 3 of
4 needed /Posted: 30-DEC-02
FH and I visited his mother shortly after the engagement
was announced. This time, she made a special point of asking
me about my cat, because she knows that I love him dearly. This
is not the first time she's asked, and as FH says, she only asks because
she knows it matters to me. That's not so bad, but I could really
do without her following up the question (every single time) with
stories about how much she hates cats and refuses to be near them.
I'm just glad that it means she will never come visit!
Signed - Once A Cat Owner,
Always A Cat Owner
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
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Frequent
Fry Her TM - Catwoman, 4 of
4 needed /Posted: 31-DEC-02
Another FSIL item: A card arrived at the house
from her. It was to my FH, stating that they hoped he was enjoying
his new home. 1) No mention of me, at all. 2)
We purchased the house together (with my funds for the down payment).
But, I consider our financial arrangements to be our own, even though
he told his mother the details of this particular case because she
was expressing concern, supposedly that I was out to bleed him dry.
3) We purchased it and moved in several months ago. My
guess is that it was a sympathy card in disguise, because his mother
is upset over the wedding not being performed according to her religion,
and is b!tching to the rest of the family. This is the sister
who got hit the hardest with the religious propaganda because of her
kids.
Signed - Still Not MIL's
Religion
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
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