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Frequent Fry HerTM
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Fighting A Losing Battle
Age: 33       MIL Age: 58
A Battle I Can't Win

frequent fry her - Fightingalosingbattle Frequent Fry Her TM - Fightingalosingbattle /Posted: 2-FEB-08
Worst gift:  One Christmas, MIL wanted to get FIL some kind of tabletop saw.  She asked us all if we wanted to split the cost 3 ways (her, SIL and us).  When we asked her how much it was, she responded, and we said, "Ok, that's fine.  We can afford that."  Over the following couple of weeks, I had worked that into our budget.  Not easy on one income, but, hey, we did it.  One day, we got a call.  MIL had asked BIL (SIL's DF at the time) to go pick it up.  I found that strange, considering he didn't even have a truck to do so, but, oh well.  When he went to pick it up, he "decided" to get a much better one, without even confirming with anybody if they could afford the other one.  He just did it.  We didn't know until the day before Christmas that the other one was more expensive.  It turned out to be 3 times as much as our original 1/3 was supposed to be.  There's no way we could pay that!  On Christmas, during the gift unwrapping, in front of the entire family, including BIL's family, FIL opened his gift.  He loved it, of course.  When thanking people, SIL said, "Well [DH and I] didn't put in for it, so don't give them credit."  Huh!  And, she told me that I need to grow up?  The saddest part is that, because of all these problems, we don't spend time with them anymore.  The kids don't see them.

        Signed - The Jig Was Up
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frequent fry her - Fightingalosingbattle Frequent Fry Her TM - Fightingalosingbattle /Posted: 1-FEB-08
Ever since we were "banned" from the holidays at MIL's house, I've ignored her phone calls.  She calls the house frequently, but I let it go to voicemail.  She, eventually, calls my DH to complain that I'm ignoring her.  DH responds with, "What do you expect?"  Well, over the weekend, she had the nerve to email my DD (almost 14) and complain to her about how I'm ignoring her.  She told my DD that the reason they don't have a relationship is because I won't let it happen.  BS!  Then, she carried on to tell my DD that if she ever gets in trouble and I yell at her, DD is to call her and she will come pick her up.  Oh, whatever!  What constitutes yelling?  Hmm?  What is she trying to plant in my child's head?  And, as I said before, all this coming from a woman who puts down a bottle of vodka a day, refuses to commit to watching the kids on any particular day so DH and I can have a date, and never tries to communicate with the kids.  We've been here over a year and she has never made any attempts at spending time with our kids.  I can't wait until our house sells so we can go back home where we belong!

        Signed - Fighting A Losing Battle
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frequent fry her - Fightingalosingbattle Frequent Fry Her TM - Fightingalosingbattle, 1 of 4 needed /Posted: 22-JAN-08
During my pregnancy with our first child, MIL and FIL were helping us financially so that we could pay for the medical expenses.  The day that we brought our newborn home, MIL threatened to quit helping financially if we didn't bring the baby over to see her.  We invited her over, explaining that the doctor told me not to go anywhere for a few days.  She refused.  She then suggested that my DH bring the baby over without me!  Finally, we relented and went over.  The next day I had some complications.

        Signed - We Relented
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frequent fry her - Fightingalosingbattle Frequent Fry Her TM - Fightingalosingbattle, 2 of 4 needed /Posted: 22-JAN-08
Last summer, we were looking to get some electrical work done.  The electrician we chose was one whom my MIL used frequently (and my DH went to high school with him).  One night, without provocation, he showed up on my doorstep.  I had just gotten off the phone with my MIL minutes before.  He didn't have any job to do, and it was 8 pm.  He claimed that he dropped by just to visit, since he had just left my MIL's house.  Weird.  Not wanting to be rude, I invited him in to see what he wanted.  He started asking about what I do on weekend nights; if I ever go out, if my DH ever takes me out, etc.  Then, he suggested that some night he would come by and take me out.  I asked him if he thought his wife would be ok with that, and he said, "Sure."  Then, I said that my DH would not approve, and he said, "Well, that's too bad, we could have fun."  Finding this odd, I sent him away and called DH to tell him what had happened.  DH thought that it was strange, too.  A few days later, MIL called DH and said, "I just called the house and your wife didn't answer.  I think she's out with a guy."  What in the world would make her think that?  Hmm.

        Signed - What In The World
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frequent fry her - Fightingalosingbattle Frequent Fry Her TM - Fightingalosingbattle, 3 of 4 needed /Posted: 24-JAN-08
Ok, here's just a little bit of an idea of how manipulating my MIL is.  SIL recently got married.  She's 33.  When my MIL and I were still speaking, she would frequently complain to me about how she's upset that SIL (her DD) won't have kids of her own.  She focused on how hurtful that was to her.  She also has complained to DH and me about SIL's new DH, and how she doesn't trust him.  She thinks that he's in it for the money (the family has a significant amount of wealth that is supposed to be passed down to DH and SIL eventually).  She also constantly talks bad about SIL's ILs, calling them trailer trash, etc.  Ironically, MIL is the one who grew up in the trailer park.  Because I am who I am, I keep my mouth shut.  It would be so easy to write in my blog (which MIL and SIL read daily) about how MIL says "this" and "that" about her own DD behind her back, but I don't believe that 2 wrongs make a right.  But, what kind of woman, honestly, will talk trash about her own DD to her DIL?

        Signed - It's Sickening!
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frequent fry her - Fightingalosingbattle Frequent Fry Her TM - Fightingalosingbattle, 4 of 4 needed /Posted: 24-JAN-08
Worst gift:  OK, my gift wasn't a terrible one, but when you see what everyone got, you will be able to identify how MIL showed DH and me that we were much less important than everyone else.  Christmas 2006:  I got a large bag of pistachio nuts (because I really like them) and DH got a sweater from a discount department store (I was there when she picked it out).  SIL got a brand name knife and block set ($200 value!).  Nice, huh?  Oh, and this last Christmas they didn't get our kids anything.  In August, they had bought the kids new loft beds.  But, they waited until late November to inform us that those beds were their presents from them.  Had we known that in August, we would have put the beds in the shed, and waited till Christmas to give them to the kids.  So, our kids feel unimportant.

        Signed - Much Less Important Than Everyone Else
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The Sister Knot, Apter
The Sister Knot
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