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Frequent Fry HerTM
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Foreign Temptress
Age: 23    MILAge: 50-odd

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress
Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress/Posted: 24-NOV-03
Every Friday afternoon, DH calls home to mommy to say hi, to let her know he's safe (on the other side of the world in a dangerous city), whatever.  This is fine by me.  BUT, it irks me, rather, that she asks him all about everything he that he's up to, and never bloody once does she ask anything about me.  Never.  Not even hi or best wishes.  She doesn't call us anymore, in case it's me who answers.

        Signed - Then She'd Have To Speak To Me

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress/Posted: 04-OCT-03
MIL refused to come to our wedding.  She cried and messed DF about, and she behaved like a kid.  Well, we had the wedding, and there she was in the hall, crying like a baby.  It was not happy crying, either.  No, she was mourning the idea that her son was marrying me.  After the ceremony, she sat in the sanctuary and waited for us to come apologize.  Sadly, she didn't tell anyone that she was waiting for us.  We were hosting a wedding reception, so it didn't occur to us to check the sanctuary for lost guests.  So, we didn't find her.  After a bit, she ran out crying and refused to be comforted.  She refused to speak to anyone.  A lot of people were . . .

        Signed - Really Confused

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress
Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress/Posted: 18-SEP-03
DF has a considerable sum of money being held for him in a trust fund.  FMIL administers the fund.  DF, about to be married, decides he wants financial independence.  He asked for his money.  FMIL refused to hand it over.  "It will destroy the family," says she.  Face it, woman, your boy's growing up.  Now she's keeping his money.  We might be able to deal with that, but we know what she does to other people's property.  When she divorced FFIL twenty years ago, part of the settlement was that she would live in an apartment belonging to him.  She lived in it for a while, and then she sold it.  FFIL doesn't know that she sold it because they never talk.  She SOLD his APARTMENT.  And, by the way, she moved in with her father, and kept the money.

        Signed - She Disgusts Me

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress/Posted: 10-AUG-03
And, by the way, it's sort of a tradition in our religion that both of your parents walk you down the aisle.  FMIL wants to walk with DF, but she doesn't want FFIL to walk with her.  She tries to guilt DF into doing this walking tradition.  She says that she has looked forward to it all her life, etc., but she REFUSES to do it with FFIL.  So, she's looked forward all her life to the tradition where both parents walk down the aisle, but in her imaginary version, she's doing it alone, or perhaps with her obnoxious boyfriend.  And, how would that make FFIL feel?

        Signed - She's A Cow

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress/Posted: 9-AUG-03
So, DF and I organized everything for our wedding in New England well in advance.  Then, DF's grandpa got pneumonia, and there was no way he could travel to the wedding.  DF and I took a deep breath, worked incredibly hard for a week, and managed to move the wedding, on two months' notice, to New York.  DF commented to his uncle, the son of the sick grandpa, that it was hard work.  Uncle said, "You're very irresponsible trying to organize a wedding on such short notice."  DF was coldly angry, and told uncle where he could put that kind of remark.  We did it FOR THE GRANDPA.  A few weeks later, we were finalizing the details, and FMIL wanted everything her way.  DF and I didn't want it her way.  Our tastes are very different.  First, FMIL called DF on the phone and screamed, cried and called him names.  DF was polite and didn't give in.  Then, FMIL had her boyfriend write me an email.  I'd never met this man.  But, he spent about three pages telling me, basically, that God will damn me to he!! (I am not joking) if I don't do everything FMIL's way.  Apparently, the Bible says that you should do everything your FMIL wants or you will go to he!!  I know my Bible.  It doesn't say that anywhere.  So, I ignored this email.  Then, FMIL's boyfriend wrote to me to say that I must be a very immature person (he's never met me, remember, and no-one who knows me thinks I'm immature - I came out of the womb at age thirty).  Why am I immature?  It is because, "When you marry the man, you marry his family," and if I was ready for marriage, I would be ready to obey his family in all matters.  So, now "mature" means "letting people push you around".  THEN - this is the best bit so far - FMIL wrote to DF.  She told him that I'm both immature and insecure because, "She is trying to steal you away from your family."  NOT TRUE, FMIL!!  NOT TRUE!!  She suggested that far from getting married, I should be in a mental home.  She also requested that we move the wedding BACK TO New England, or, preferably, to another country altogether, so that she wouldn't have to come.  Well, who's the immature one?

        Signed - MIL is Five Years Old Again

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress/Posted: 9-AUG-03
DF to FFIL, "You need to remember that this is my wedding, and mum is going to have to make some compromises."  FFIL to DF, "You have to remember that this is her big day."  So apparently MY WEDDING DAY is now HER WEDDING DAY.  She couldn't make her marriage work, so now she wants mine?  Someone just can't appreciate that a wedding day belongs to the bride and the groom, and while the groom's mother is the honored guest, the bride calls the shots.  This is ESPECIALLY TRUE when the groom's mother is not putting a penny towards the wedding.  HER BIG DAY??????  To his credit, my DF went ballistic.  He couldn't believe that either.

        Signed - She's Trying to Take Over My Wedding Day - The Cow

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress/Posted: 9-AUG-03
It was Thanksgiving, and we're making pies.  I happen to be a very good baker, and I was making piecrust my way, in my kitchen.  She was visiting.  She looked at the syrupy glop that's my pie dough before it's finished, and said, "What on earth's that?"  I told her, "It's pie crust," and she wailed, "Oh no!  I could have told you how to make pie crust!  No-one will eat that!"  She tried to take it away.  My DF put his foot down, and I finished my pies in peace.  Later, she decided that we needed more pie (funny, that!), and made pie her way, saying, "This is how you make pie crust, see!  This one will be nice."  She went on and on about how bad my pie would be.  I only took a little smug pleasure in the fact that my pies disappeared quicker than rats out of an aqueduct, and hers sat about for days.  No one wanted them.  They were too thick and dry.

        Signed - Pie Isn't The Worst of It

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress, 1 of 4 needed
Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress, 1 of 4 needed/Posted: 5-AUG-03
The wedding is coming up, and we're still trying to keep it small, forty guests.  We suggested to FMIL that she may invite twenty (generous by anyone's count, since she's not paying for anything).  She insisted on 67, no fewer.  I politely and firmly refused to comply with this.  FU(uncle)IL told me, "It is the right thing to do (to do what she wants)".  I refused, politely.  Next, I heard that she was on the blower to all of those 67 friends, telling them that I'm a "manipulative b!tch".  "How dare she tell me who I can and can't invite to my son's wedding", said she.  Er, because it's MY wedding, not HERS?

        Signed - I'm Not A Manipulative B!tch!

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress, 2 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress, 2 of 4 needed/Posted: 7-AUG-03
DF and I met while studying abroad.  I'm English, he's American.  His mother came to visit us in our student pad abroad (we were sharing a flat).  She refused to come during our winter break, when he'd asked her to come.  She had to come over Thanksgiving.  She came, and every single day she spent HOURS on the phone to America (on OUR phone bill), going on about what a horrible time she was having.  My DF refused to take time off from his courses to be with her.  Of course, this makes him rude, selfish, and means that he doesn't care about his mother, etc.  Never mind that he asked her to come during the break, and never mind that he's a responsible student who doesn't want to miss courses.  So, she ran up a huge phone bill, telling all the folks back home how mean he was being.  And she's the most inconsiderate person.  EVERY TIME she washed her hands (or anything else), she had to take a fresh towel.  After three days there was a huge pile of once-used towels on the floor, and she asked if she could do the wash.  DF told her, "No," as she couldn't possibly need to do laundry, and she could reuse those towels, since they weren't dirty.  About this time, her nasty used sanitary items appeared in my bathroom, in the bucket I use for cleaning the floor.  Hello?  Has this woman ever heard of garbage cans?

        Signed - She Didn't Even Wrap Them Up

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress, 3 of 4 needed
Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress, 3 of 4 needed/Posted: 8-AUG-03
FMIL and DF's ex like to get together and b!tch about me.  Then, it trickles back to DF because both of them want to show how pleased they are that they've been talking about me.  I've met each of them for one week only, and both of them are convinced that I don't love him.  Apparently, they're horrified that I don't kiss him, etc.  Well, I was always taught it was VERY rude to kiss your DF in front of your guests, especially his ex!  So, they get together and have their little chats about me.  I think DF doesn't tell me most of it - he doesn't need to.  Incidentally, the first time I met the ex, she pleaded with me to "give him back", "give her one more chance", etc.  If DF had WANTED another chance, he wouldn't be my DF!

        Signed - They Are Convinced That I Don't Love Him

frequent fry her - foreigntemptress, 4 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM - foreigntemptress, 4 of 4 needed/Posted: 8-AUG-03
I'm really getting bad feelings about the FMIL.  FDH is 22 now.  MIL still has all of his baby teeth.  She has the clippings from his haircuts.  She has a tape of him, at the age of about six, reciting the prayer for the lighting of the Chanukah candles.  Is she planning some kind of voodoo?

        Signed - I'm Not Giving Her Any of My Teeth


The Sister Knot, Apter
The Sister Knot
Why We Fight, Why We're Jealous, and Why We'll Love Each Other No Matter What

Secret Paths: Women in the New Midlife
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Women in the New Midlife

Working Women Don't Have Wives, Dr. Terri Apter Working Women Don't Have Wives
Professional Success in the 1990'S

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