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Frequent Fry HerTM
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Imagine That
Age: 44    MIL Age: 76

What did I know?

frequent fry her - Imagine That, 1 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM - Imagine That, 1 of 4 needed /Posted: 24-JUN-02
Well, folks, no matter what I say about hubby, he comes by it all naturally - every little irritating thing.  Oh yes, MIL is fun.  Did I mention that I wanted to keep her and send him back to the UK?  I was mistaken.  Boy, was I mistaken!  So, you know how old women get that "smell"?  Yesterday it was hot and humid, and MIL wanted to come shopping with my daughter and me.  Only, she had that "smell".  She needed new bras, but she had that "smell".  Sorry, guys, but you haven't lived till you've spent 40 minutes in a dressing room with a woman in a 44DD bra.  Yep, she needed a new one.  And it was hot.  And I had to help her try them on.  Not that I'm complaining, really.  But it was hot (did I mention that?), and she was sweating.  And the dressing room was about 3x3.  And 30 bras later, I was about ready to pass out, when lo and behold, she found the bra of her dreams.  She was almost in tears, and so was I (for different reasons, I'm sure).  She asked how much it was, and at that point it didn't matter!  Did I mention there was a "smell"?  And it was hot.  Oh, and yes, she repeats herself - constantly.  HELP!  It's rubbing off.  Remind me to tell you the whiskey story.  Oh, and the 10 hour trip to Amish country.

        Signed - Imagine That

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - Imagine That, 2 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM - Imagine That, 2 of 4 needed /Posted: 24-JUN-02
Short synopsis of my day (vacation with MIL):  MIL slept in (we all decided it was nice and quiet without her), and was upset that we didn't wake her.  She threw a fit when I didn't want to go out with her and hubby.  Then, she insisted that it was my hubby who was upset.  Then, she told me that he said he wouldn't go anywhere without me, so I had to go.  Hubby said, "It's your vacation too, and if you want to sit around in the sun all day, that's what you should do."  She got upset because I refused to wait while she toddled back to the car, with her walker, to get her camera (the one with the dead batteries) so she could take a picture of me standing in 109 degree heat in front of a building (even though we'd been in the car for 3 hours, and I really had to gooooo!).  She got upset that I told her not to take off her shoes to put her feet in a lake because the bottom of the lake was all silt and sharp rocks.  She flipped over in the pool because she was trying to float with one of those long tube-shaped floaty things, and she got upset because she panicked and went head first into the water.  It was, of course, our fault because we weren't paying attention to her - who knew?  She was in almost 2 feet of water.  She didn't want an appetizer at dinner, but ate all of mine.  She tried to get into someone else's car in a parking lot.  She also has this habit of saying, "I know, I know," when she asks something and you are giving her an answer.  And, of course, she's one of those people who "knows" just about everything.  "I knew you should have turned there.  I knew that building was over there.  I knew the place wasn't out this way.  I knew you should have ordered that."  She's amazing!

        Signed - Long Island Iced Tea, Here I Come!

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - Imagine That, 3 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM - Imagine That, 3 of 4 needed /Posted: 25-JUN-02
Vacation with MIL- the end.  Oh, I wished!  But, no.  She IS gone, however.  Yay!  And, so you all know, now I'm a psychotic b!tch.  As it was, I snapped.  I'd gone into my closet Friday night and closed the closet door when I left.  Saturday morning, after she got up (she was staying in my room), I went to get my baseball cap to do some yard work.  My closet was open, and when I asked who was in there, DH asked why anyone would go in there.  She said with a smirk, "I was rummaging through and stealing things."  After the obligatory, "You had no business in my closet, and you really need to get her out of here," followed by her answer, "You are psychotic," I went outside.  I came in a while later to get some bags, and I can't remember what was said.  I just know that she said something to DH, and was smirking as I walked past.  She was sitting in front of the TV eating a bowl of cereal.  I shut the TV off.  Yes, I am that much of a b!tch.  I don't think I would have bothered with her, but after days of this and the smirking, I'd really had enough.  I did say that she didn't need to be watching TV, she needed to be packing and leaving.  DH just sat there on his computer.  Of course she started the maniacal laughter and yelling.  He came over to turn the TV back on and started yelling.  Ok, I knew I'd really had enough, and had heard it all, but DH was yelling that he KNEW what I'd said to her the other day.  He KNEW that I'd handed her her walker and told her to get the muck out, and start walking.  Handed?  Nope.  Daughter came downstairs and told him he was wrong.  She'd been there and seen this conversation.  She told him his mother was lying, and MIL started yelling at my daughter that she was a liar.  At that point, DS came upstairs and was telling DH to calm down and just get his mother out.  I walked past her to go back outside and she slapped my arm (with that smirk on her face).  So I flipped her bowl.  It got worse.  DH pushed me and I landed on her.  She started slapping me on the head and arm, so I slapped her arm.  Then I got up and yelled that they needed to get out.  DS was holding DH, and MIL was screaming, "Look what she did.  Look what she did."  After I stood up, she tried to hit me with the bowl.  I pulled it away and put it in the sink.  When I went back over with wet towels, she stood up and pushed me.  Then she slapped me again (because at this point, DH was talking to my son and not paying attention to her), so I slapped her arm again.  DH told her to go in the other room, but she stood beside the kitchen counter.  I went to throw out the towels (there was a lot of commotion - the kids were telling DH that she was lying, DH was yelling, MIL was yelling, and I sort of tuned things out).  DH was holding her mouth, telling her to shut up, do nothing, and stop smirking.  She turned around and said something to me like, "This is my son's house, you get out."  So, I figured it was time she had help removing herself.  And yes, I threw her small bags out into the hallway.  They all came into the bedroom as I was picking up.  She had a whole box of eaten candy bar wrappers and cookie package wrappers laying beside the bed, and a pile of tissues on the bed.  She came in screaming, "Don't touch those, I'll get those."  Anyway, then I tossed some things out onto the patio.  DH put the rest of her stuff in the car and I took DD with me to the yard.  MIL came out, got into the car, and was still smirking.  DH got in the car, yelling at her to stop.  And they left.  I think my blood pressure was through the roof at that point.  The kids and I were sitting and talking, and it dawned on me that I hadn't seen the whiskey bottle.  So, I opened the cupboard, and it was gone.  DS looked in the trash.  She had put it in a brown paper bag and shoved it to the bottom of the can.  Did I mention that she had 2 fifths the first week?  This was a gallon bottle that we bought right before we left on vacation, only days ago.  Apparently, when I stayed home the other day (the day she told hubby she spent in the bedroom), she came out in the afternoon and told my daughter that her legs were sore from laying on the bed all day (guess she thought that would lend to her credibility).  My son's GF said that DH'd had a conversation with her (she said that she was sitting and ignoring him the whole time), in which he told her how his mother was crying all afternoon and that I was the cause of all the problems.  Bolstered by MIL's lies, my kids not getting involved, and my mother not telling him he was wrong, he apparently believes that I only tell the good things, and never put myself in a bad light.  DD told him that he was mistaken, and MIL started shouting that the kids were taking my side because they're my kids.  DH knows better than that, but apparently since she was shouting that, he started shouting that.  Both my kids will not take sides.  They'll both stay clear if there's an argument, because they know he will try and drag them into it.  Anyway, he hasn't spoken to me.  I don't imagine that it will get much better.  But, at least it's quiet.  Sorry, I am not an angel, and I don't think I've only given a side of this where I was the good guy.  But, my nerves are shot from all of this, and I know there's no going back.  Boom, boom, ain't it great to be crazy?

        Signed - Boom, Boom, Ain't It Great To Be Crazy?

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - Imagine That, 4 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM - Imagine That, 4 of 4 needed /Posted: 25-JUN-02
Vacation with MIL.  Oh boy, will I miss her when she's gone.  Well folks, in the last 48 hours, I have become a "mitch from mell".  I think it was the inane chatter that finally got me.  Dunno, it could have been the annoying little way she has of wanting to know everything I'm doing, every minute that I'm awake (and sometimes when I'm asleep).  Or, it could have been the staring.  No matter what caused it, I thought I should just stick to myself for the better part of yesterday.  Every 15 minutes, either hubby or his mom would ask me what was wrong.  I tried to be nice.  I really just tried to stay out of everyone's way.  I tried to pretend that I had a really bad headache so they would just leave me the heck alone.  None of it worked.  The two of them sat with my mom for the better part of the afternoon discussing what could possibly be upsetting me.  And, the funny thing was that they all acted like they didn't have a clue.  Yes, 3 weeks is WAY too long for this visit.  Hubby finally nagged me till I told him that his mother was driving me insane, and that I just really wanted to be left alone for a bit.  He hasn't spoken to me since.  I figured that after a good night's sleep, I'd be back to my normal self.  When I got up this morning, I asked if he wanted to go to a casino and play some cards.  He said (keep in mind he KNOWS I've been irritated to no end), "I'll see what my mother wants to do."  HELLOOOOOO?  She wasn't even awake yet, and I didn't recall inviting her anywhere.  So, we waited and waited and she finally got up.  He told her that we (he and I) were going to the casino.  And the next thing I knew, he said that she was going along because if he was going somewhere, she wanted to go.  OK, I was at the breaking point, and I was tired of being nice.  I said, "Forget it."  I really just can't handle her, and this is my vacation too.  So, from the other room (now remember, she can't hear anything when you are talking to her directly), she yelled," Oh, I don't have to go.  I'd just like to."  Of course, now he's not going to go anywhere without her.  My mother told him not to worry.  She could stay with my MIL and keep her company.  Oh no.  No chance of that happening.  He said that she REALLY wants to go along.  Dad to the rescue.  Dad came in and said, "I want to go play cards, come with me."  They (DH and MIL) wouldn't have dared suggest that they go along.  Hubby knows better than that.  So, off we went.  Dad and I had a great time together, and got back home only minutes before they did.  After another hour of inane chatter, mom suggested that we all go out to dinner.  I wasn't hungry.  We had just eaten, and I told them that.  But, I thought that if we were all going, it might not be so bad.  Only dad didn't go along.  When we got to the casino, DH said that he was not going to eat, and MIL started complaining about her indigestion from lunch.  So, why were we there?  I swear, I'm not getting on the plane tomorrow.

        Signed - Not Getting On The Plane Tomorrow

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )


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