Worst gift: When my
husband and I got engaged, my FMIL said that she would give the
glass cookware that she got for free with her microwave to us as
a wedding present.
Signed - She Got For
Free
Worst gift: My MIL sent
me a box of tampons last year. She actually mailed it to me.
I made sure to send her a long gushing thank you note.
Signed - Box Of Tampons
RESPONSE: Box Of Tampons
What a truly thoughtful gift! I think you should reciprocate
with a box of douche. I think that is what the etiquette experts
would suggest.;-).
RESPONSE: Box Of Tampons
OHMYGOODNESS!! I liked your reaction, BTW. LOL!
But, it may be time for the "Geriatric Basket" for this
MIL. Take a basket, put some Easter grass in it, then put
in some gifts for her - like wrinkle cream, wart remover, corn pads,
denture cleaner, etc. In fact, I recommend this gift to all
the MILs who have given hurtful and awful gifts.J
RESPONSE: Box Of Tampons
Maybe you should send her a package of adult diapers for her birthday
or Christmas. Or, better yet, Rogaine for Women.
RESPONSE: Box Of Tampons
Tampons? I can't even begin to image how to respond to something
like that! Why would ANYONE in the world give someone a gift
like that? If I got something like that, especially from someone
older than me (and especially a MIL!), I would wait until her next
birthday or Christmas, and give a package of adult diapers!
I mean, it makes as much sense as tampons, for crying out loud!
Worst gift: The worst
gift I have ever received (which just so happened to come from MIL)
could have actually been a really nice gift. I was due to
have a baby in the first part of January, so for Christmas MIL decided
that she would buy me a really nice gown to wear in the hospital.
First of all, let me just say that I am very cold by nature, and
it would be during the middle of winter. Plus, hospitals are
usually cold. So, I had already picked out a couple of sets
of warm PJs, and my mom had purchased them for me already as a shower
gift a couple months before. Anyway, I was at the in-law's
for Christmas and MIL handed me my gift. Everyone stopped
to watch me (at MIL's request). Well, I opened it up, and
in the box was a silk, leopard skin see-through gown. It had
thin spaghetti straps, the back was open all the way to my waistline,
the front was low cut and had a "hole" in the top center.
The gown was long, but both sides were slit to my hips. Of
course, when you are pregnant, your breasts tend to grow a little,
and this gown (actually lingerie) did not fully cover me because
the "hole" would gape open, and the sides were meant to
show a little "skin". Don't forget, it is see-through!
She also purchased a robe with it, because she said she knew I was
often cold. Well, the robe was also see-through, and it had
short-sleeves. It was actually a nice looking set (for a honeymoon),
but there was no way I was going to wear it in the hospital after
having my baby. I waited until she came to the hospital (I
even took the trashy thing), and told her that I tried it on and
it wouldn't fit, so I had to wear something else. She got
so mad at me, and popped off, that I could just have the receipt
and take it back if I hated it so much. It is still in a box
under my dresser at home.
Signed - Leopard Mommy
RESPONSE: Leopard Mommy
What a Loon!! What were you supposed to do? Flash everyone
in the maternity ward?? Personally, I wouldn't/couldn't wear
it for a romantic evening - not from a MIL like yours. I would
take her up on returning it, and get something appropriate.
Maybe then she will learn.
RESPONSE: Leopard Mommy
My response to my MIL would have been something like, " Gee,
I can't wait to have this baby and slim my body so that my husband
can see me in this. This is so nice, I can't wait for hubby
to see me in this." Then tell MIL, "Thank you, this
will be nice to wear for my husband."
RESPONSE: Leopard Mommy
First of all, that's just creepy. The last thing I want is
my own mom buying me lingerie. But my MIL? Gross!
What was that woman thinking? Yuk! You were too polite!
RESPONSE: Leopard Mommy
She probably got it for herself for some big night of seduction
- and got stood up or rejected. This sounds suspiciously like
a pass-it-on gift! Or, she's incredibly insensitive.
Or, she is full of spite, and wants to get a "message"
through - perhaps that your "sexiness" got her son to
get you, ahem, in the "family way". She sounds obsessive.
Yuck!
RESPONSE: Leopard Mommy
Good Lord! What did your DH say about this nonsense?
Surely, since she was a mother, she knows that a woman can't wear
something like that after having a baby. She is just stupid,
or needs help. I think I would have laughed at her and said,
"MIL, did you forget to take your medication again?" or
I would have said something like, "MIL, you are mistaken.
This is what I wore the night the baby was conceived."
Maybe that comment would have embarrassed her so much that she would
never try to be "helpful" again in getting you clothes.
I say, throw away the gown. You can't wear it now for a romantic
night with your DH because it would remind both of you of your MIL!
EWWWWWWWW!!!
First of all, I would
like to say that I am so glad that I found this web site!
I feel very alone when it comes to my family situation, outside
of our own immediate family. I haven't had much of a relationship
with my mother since I was a child - I'm now 31. She is an
alcoholic who, on a continuous basis, emotionally abuses me and
makes me feel very sad. She loves to blab every personal thing
I've ever confided to her about to everyone. When I married
my husband of 12 years, I thought I would be accepted into his family
(not exactly like a daughter/sister) in a better way than my family
has been over the years. Well, I got a real kick in the face.
And, the sad thing is that I didn't even realize how many really
evil things my MIL was doing to me, because I loved my DH so much
that I guess it kept me naive (at least for 10 years). I guess
I should've started to catch a clue when she wore black and red
to our wedding, then left the reception before any of the dances
had begun. She scowled in all of our pictures, too.
I guess I just didn't want to believe that she wasn't accepting
me, or that she couldn't stand me. I found that out much too
late. We were letting her watch our son when he was an infant.
Since it was winter, we gave her a key so she would be able to get
into the house with the baby when she got to our home. BIG
MISTAKE! It seems that, while the cat was away, the mice was
definitely playing. She was snooping through all of our things,
and writing in things on our calendar that she thought we should
have on there. She was buying things for the house whenever
she would see my list of things I wanted to pick up for our house,
etc. Then, when our son turned 2, she started teaching him
a lot of really bad and dangerous behaviors. Example:
We had a latch lock on the front door, so that in the summer DS
couldn't open the door and run out (if I was in the bathroom or
something, and he wasn't in my sight for a minute). We all
know how fast they can be. One day, our son watched me put
the latch on the front door. Then, he walked over to get the
broom in a matter-of-fact way, went to the door, and used the handle
to knock the latch loose! I couldn't believe it. So
I said, "Where did you learn to do that?" His reply
was, "Gramma teached me". When we asked her about
it, she didn't deny it. She wanted him to get that door open
so he could be in danger by running in the street. That way,
I would look like a bad and neglectful mother, and my DH would be
able to see that I wasn't taking good care of him all day like he
thought I was. MIL DID NOT like the idea that I was only working
part time at night, and staying home with our son during the day.
My DH even told her that he wanted it that way, and we agreed that
it was for the best until our son was in school. MIL did everything
she could to drive me nuts and make me "lose it".
She figured that, if my mother is an alcoholic and a "nut",
then I must be one too if provoked. She taught our son to
kick and punch me every time I tried to put his shoes and coat on
to go somewhere, or if we were leaving her house. She would
see me struggling with him, and she wouldn't say a word. She
would just sit there and smirk at me. DH and I went through
a tough time in our marriage, and she was doing everything she could
to get us to divorce. She planted things in our room so I
would find them, and probably accuse my DH of messing around.
I once made the mistake of telling my SIL that I was suffering from
depression and felt suicidal (because I didn't have anyone else
to talk to about this very touchy subject, and SIL has been through
same thing). So, it got back to MIL, and she taught our son
to get into the kitchen drawer, take a steak knife out, and rub
it back and forth on his wrist under my kitchen table. And,
then, when I found him doing this, he looked at me with a big grin
on his face. That's just plain out sick for a person (let
alone a grandmother) to teach a child to do such a thing.
The sad thing is that I have no proof. She knows the way to
do things, and how to cover her tracks. I swear that if I
would've had a spy camera on her, she would have been in A LOT of
trouble! Oh well, there is nothing I can do now, except to
keep my children away from her, and never, ever leave him in a room
with her by herself. It's been a very shocking thing that
I've had to deal with, and I can't really talk to many people about
it, because it's so bizarre. It's almost unbelievable, I think.
Heck, I thought I was going crazy for a while there! Thank
God my DH knows his mother IS capable of doing such things, even
though I know it hurts for him to admit it. He has cut off
all communications with her, too - by his own choice, not mine.
There are a lot of other things I could vent about, and they are
just as shocking. But, it would take too long. Again,
I would like to say how grateful I am to have found this place so
that I can air some of my cooped up feelings out. Thank you
if you've stayed with this story till the end.
Signed - Thank God My
DH Knows His Mother
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
You should be proud that you had the strength to get through all
of that. Pop over to the message board and vent whenever you
feel the urge. Everyone over there is very understanding.
As far as your situation goes, it sounds like you now have your
DH on your side, and the beast (your MIL) doesn't see your family
anymore. If this is the case, I'm very happy for you - though
sympathetic - that you had to go through something so awful to get
to peace. Anybody who teaches a child the things your MIL
was teaching should never be allowed around children. Her
mind was so warped that she thought it was perfectly acceptable
to endanger her own grandchild for the possibility of making you
look bad, or of tipping you over the edge. Thank god you have
her out of your lives. All the best for you and your family's
future.
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
Yours is the WORST MIL I have heard about on this site. PLEASE
come over to the boards. You are not alone. You are
not crazy. I just can't even address the things you said in
just one answer. Please come over and start a thread and get
some quick feedback and support.
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
I have some advice for you regarding your MIL - take your oldest
to a shrink and discuss everything that has gone on. Make
sure that you tell the shrink you have banned the MIL from contact
because of her behavior, but that you are concerned about the long-term
treatment of your children. I say this, because I think it
would be in your best interests to get a record of this insane behavior.
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
Sorry your MIL's a psycho! I am glad your DH can see that
she is really out there! My MIL is very much the same as yours,
and it took my DH years to see her true colors!!! He also
made his decision to stay away from his mother. He is afraid
of her, and believes there is no hope for her. It is only
too bad that others in the family can't come forward and have all
these mean, manipulative MILs put in rubber rooms where they can
no longer hurt someone!
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
What a psycho! Aside from the damage she tried to do to your
marriage, it was absolutely inexcusable for her to put your son
in danger by showing him those "tricks". Too bad
there was no spycam. You could probably have her locked up
for endangering him! Lucky for you, DH also sees what an evil
person she is.
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
I try to reason as to why people do what they do, and this one takes
the cake. Only allow your children with her if you or your
DH is present. The children need to know her, and they will
pick up on her sooner than you think. Children are smart.
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
Your MIL is a sick, dangerous woman! Thank God your DH sees
this. You should have no further contact with her. And
please, please don't let her anywhere near your son ever again!
The mind games she has played with him have put him in serious physical
danger. That is child abuse! The psychological harm,
too, is a serious concern. Have you thought about taking him
to a child psychologist? Who knows what else this woman has
said or done to your son. I'm just really glad for you that
your DH is not a momma's boy, and understands just what his mother
is capable of. The woman is pure evil!
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
Your MIL is the worst I've ever heard of.!!! What a SICK,
SICK woman to teach her own grandchild how to get out of the house
so he hopefully runs into the street and gets hurt!?!??! I'm
not one to advocate violence, but I would've handed her her own
teeth after that one!!!! Stay far, far away from that evil
witch. It's great that your husband sees her for what she
is. Please consider going to AL-anon. They will help
you cope with what you've been through. And, write in so we
can see how you are doing. My prayers are with you!!!
RESPONSE: Thank God My DH Knows His Mother
My gosh. What a sick, sadistic witch!!! NEVER have anything
to do with her again, no matter what!!!
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