My MIL is very passive
aggressive, and overly concerned with her son - my husband.
Though we have been married 27 years, and have four children, she
still tells him how she has seen his old girlfriends around, and
she gives them our phone number. They've actually called,
thinking we have marriage problems. She also is a very nasty
letter writer. She wrote to my husband that it must be awfully
tiring to carry my pedestal around by himself, and maybe we should
get servants to help us to do it. In the same letter, she
wrote that she would never love me because I do no work.
Signed - See Her As Little
As Possible
RESPONSE: See Her As Little As Possible
I guess I don't understand why your DH allows MIL to disrespect
you, your marriage, and him for 27 years. Is he able to walk
around? I would think he would have trouble, since it sounds
like he has no spine. I admire you. I don't know how
you have put up with MIL all these years.
I have just found this
web sight, and it is great. I know that I am not alone with
the only bad MIL, but I know that my MIL has got to be the worst.
I should have known what I was getting into when, on our first meeting,
she called me a whore and threw me out of her house (I was, at this
time, still a virgin). About a year later, when my DH and
I were getting married, my FMIL introduced me to all of her friends
by saying, "This is my future DIL. She is pregnant, and
not Catholic." She controlled all aspects of planning
the wedding. She did not like the wedding invitations that
we had picked, so she went and had new ones made. I had 10
people in our wedding party who I did not know, and have not seen
since. She is of another culture from me, so that was another
strike against me. She planned a bridal shower for me, BUT
she did not invite me until the night before. My mom and I
went to meet her the next day, but she left without us, and did
not tell us where it was being held. She told everyone there
that my mother and I were prejudiced, and did not want to come.
She opened all the presents. She did give them to me later.
I got a lot of dirty looks from her friends after that. She
insisted that she was to be the last one down the aisle at the wedding
to give a blessing. The person planning the wedding put a
stop to that, but my MIL was not happy. Five years later,
she still says that all of her friends loved her wedding.
She insults me at every turn. When I finally got a backbone,
and I told my DH that he had better have her stop, or he would have
to chose between us. Well, she stopped doing things in front
of him. She waits for him to leave to start in on me.
He said that if he didn't see it, there was nothing he could do.
I could go on forever about the things that she has done.
I always win the one-up me stories at work when we have MIL stories.
It's funny now, when I look back. But, what is even worse
is that she may come live with us. She had a stroke, and can
not live alone.
Signed - Worst MIL Ever
RESPONSE: Worst MIL Ever
NURSING HOME!
RESPONSE: Worst MIL Ever
Well, you definitely win the award for worst MIL, in my opinion.
I really thought I had the worst. It appears though, that
mine is just ignorant and crazy, whereas yours is beyond words.
As for her living with you, I believe I would call a nursing home
somewhere in North Dakota to get her out of your life. Although,
I do believe in forgiving, it's hard to forget, and you shouldn't.
I would put her in her place. Although, her living with you
and being unable to really care of herself does sound like fun.
You could really mess with her when your husband isn't home!
Payback!
RESPONSE: Worst MIL Ever
My goodness, ma'am - get yourself over to the message boards!
You need more than one post, and over there you can get immediate
feedback.
RESPONSE: Worst MIL Ever
LOL. My MIL had a stroke, too. Sad thing is, not one
of her 9 children give a hoot about her. Poor old wind bag,
probably gonna end up in a convalescent home. She should have
thought about this before being so nasty!
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- Right Husband Wrong MIL/Posted: 19-APR-02
Did you ever ONCE give your MIL the benefit of the
doubt, and then regret it every day since??? Well, I have!!
Back when hubby and I were dating and things were somewhat normal
between his parents and I, I allowed his mother to talk me into
something. Never again!! Sweetie was still in the military
at the time, and was out to sea for about 5 months. Well,
the wonderful time finally arrived when his boat was scheduled to
come home. His mother got the call that the boat was coming
in on such and such a day, at such and such a time. Well,
at first she got upset, because that was the day she already took
off so that she could bake Christmas cookies and get the house ready
for Christmas. So, she decides that she and my FIL wouldn't
go up to welcome the boat home. So, in the meantime, I made
plans to get myself up to the base. I'd mapped out my bus
schedule, and arranged to stay at one of the wive's houses.
So, about 3 days before I needed to leave, MIL called and told me
that they have reconsidered, and would be going up after all.
I explained that I had already made plans, and I'd just see them
at the pier that morning. She insisted that I travel with
them and share their hotel room. They would pay for the room,
gas, and tolls. She said it would be nice to welcome her son
home "as a family". Well, whatever, I conceded to
that. I found out, on the evening that we are suppose to leave,
that she had tickets to a concert, and we wouldn't be leaving till
about 10:00 or 11:00 PM. The base was about a 4-5 hour drive
away!! So, by this time, I was fuming!! She said that
the tickets cost her $30, and she wouldn't give them up just so
that they could leave for the base earlier. This would be
the second "homecoming" that they'd be going to, so it
wasn't anything new or special to them. I wouldn't care if
it were my 50th homecoming - I would have sold those tickets in
a heartbeat!! So, we finally got to our hotel at about 3:30
in the morning. We had to be up at 7:00 to be at the base
for 9:00. Sweetie's boat came in, and it was wonderful - I
ditched his parents the second we got to the pier, and hung out
with the other wives and girlfriends. So, we went back to
his barracks, dumped some of his gear off, and picked up some things
he needed to bring home with him. Then, we went out sightseeing,
and to an early dinner. After dinner, we went back to the
hotel, and found that the maid had overlooked our room. This
wasn't a big deal to anyone, except for my MIL. She stormed
up to the front desk and told them that we were checking out, and
demanded a refund! So, after only sleeping for about 3 hours,
we all piled back into the car (DH included, because he was granted
"leave" for about a week) and drove home. Here is
the catch, though. DH drove back home with mommy dearest in
the front, while I was stuck in the back seat with my snoring FIL!
UGH!!! And, to top it off, every time that we get into an
argument, she throws the trip up in our faces. "Well,
I can't be that awful of a person, after all, I did AGREE to bring
her up with us when your boat came home for Christmas that time".
Yada, Yada, Yada.
OK, when DH and I were
dating, I was under the misconception that his mom was cool.
I had only met his family once (for 4 days) because they live across
the country (DH is military). When we called to tell them
that we were engaged, everything seemed fine. But, slowly,
things started going downhill. She had offered to pay for
my cake, so I took her up on it. And, then, she informed me
that she had never offered, and it was very rude of me to ask.
Then, they were broke (or so they claimed), so they said that they
were not gonna be able to do anything (contribute at all) for the
wedding, and that they might not even be able to come down for it.
Of course, FIL (who I love) was determined to be here, but MIL was
being wishy-washy and annoying. We had asked SIL (15 yrs old
at the time) to be a bridesmaid, and BIL (13 at the time) to be
an usher. They had accepted, so I forced DH to make his mom
nail down whether they were coming or not. DH had also asked
FIL to be one of his groomsmen. So, finally, she had to admit
that they were going to fly in so they could all be involved.
Then, she decided that they needed to stay with us (remember the
broke thing?) for a week before and a week after. I was, like,
"No way!" Because DH is military, we couldn't go
anywhere for a honeymoon. So, we were just gonna chill out
at home alone for a week. Spend it with ILs????? I Don't
think so!!! I finally got it down to 3 days before the wedding
and 2 days after. That was the best I could get, because they
had already bought plane tickets! So, we went on with the
planning. I told DH that his parents had to pay for the rehearsal
dinner or we weren't having one. My parents had paid for everything
and then some, and just couldn't do it anymore. Apparently,
this didn't sit well with MIL. She informed my DH that we
should have a potluck rehearsal dinner - everyone should come to
my house and bring a dish. First, tacky! Hey - come
to our rehearsal and be in our wedding, but bring some food?
Umm, no. I wanted to go to the restaurant where DH and I had
our first date (and so did he), and I made him fight for it.
Finally, they agreed. Then, we had to go reserve the tuxes.
We paid for FIL and BIL's tuxes because they were not here, and
MIL was gonna send me a check. Think that happened?
Nope. I also paid for all my bridesmaid dresses by credit
card (because we ordered them all at once online), and they all
paid me back - except MIL. Even my sister paid me for hers!
Then, they finally arrived. MIL immediately decided my house
(DH and I were living together before marriage -gasp!) was not clean
enough, and set out to "tidy up". She rearranged
my dishes and silverware into a "more organized" manner.
She amazed me - she wore some shiny, sheer, lacy, almost see through
nightgown around the house at night with no robe (I really didn't
want to see that much - thank you!), and cooked breakfast in it
in the mornings! She even answered the door to one of my neighbors
wearing it - a guy who was very shocked and embarrassed! Then,
she wrote down recipes and instructions on how to cook for me, so
DH could have her home cooked food while he was away from home.
She didn't get that he was home - her home was no longer where he
lived! AAAGH!!! Plus, he hated her cooking!!
Signed - Annoying Woman
Invades My House!!!
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