I really need your help.
I went to an engagement encounter at a hotel. In the encounter,
DH and I talked about the different issues that we thought could
be a problem to our relationship. We solved them, and promised
our lives to each other. We made our vows, and realized that
we are meant for each other. We are already married by the
civil law in another country. We got married last January.
We are very much in love. We understood our own weaknesses
and strengths, and we really wanted to share our lives together.
Please, I would really appreciate it if you could help me.
Read this, it is very important to our future. This is the
situation: We, on our own, were very happy. Of course
we had arguments, but we solved them. We don't have any major
troubles. DH said that my weakness is my temperament, and
his is that he needs to be more open and able to make his own decisions.
But we love each other a lot. Unfortunately, the problems
started between my mom and his parents. We were holding a
wedding shower in April. Everybody was invited. His
parents told him and me that they will be organizing this party,
but that they wanted DH to pay for everything. His parents
love me a lot. But, they started to be upset with us because
we decided to have me cook, instead of catering the party.
MIL told us that she was very upset because she thought I was "changing
her plans in order to hurt her" and she became more furious
when she knew that DH and I were decided. That situation was
worse when his mom and dad started thinking that my mom was the
one who changed the meal plan. His mother started saying bad
things about me to DH. The wedding shower day came and was
very hectic. A lot of friends came but unfortunately during the
shower my mother-in-law kept saying hurtful things to my mom.
Because of this, his mom hurt my mom, and then my father-in-law
started arguing with my mother. My mom also said some bad things
to them. In spite of this situation, I continue loving my
in-laws, but I don't know what to do. My in-laws came to Mexico
in January. We treated them really nicely with open arms.
And, what was happening was that they were not doing the same once
my mom was here. On Sunday after the mass, we tried to have
a meal all together, but his dad was rude. They didn't want
to pray for the meals. His dad said to me: I don't care where
you eat and at what time I'm eating! But, he did it in a very
rude way, and I was very disappointed, because I remembered when
they came to Mexico last December we were really nice to them: we
made meals for them, picked them up from the airport, paid for their
hotel, acted as tourist guides, gave them hospitality in our apartment,
etc. And, then I got disappointed and said, "Well, I
was hoping that everybody would sit down and wait to have a meal
all together." His parents live in Texas, so after that
weekend, they returned. DH and I were very happy. I
prepared lunch every day for him. We shared lunch time, but
unfortunately his mom started telling DH how bad my mom was, and
that I was not good enough for him. DH and I agreed to solve
all the situations, and we agreed not to bring the parents together
again because that would damage our relationship. Unfortunately,
his mom insisted that DH bring my mom and me to Texas that weekend.
In the past, when we spent time with his parents, they were very
nice to me, and I always respected them and loved them. But,
DH and I agreed not to go, at least not that time, to Texas.
Unfortunately, his mom insisted, and DH changed his mind, even after
I told him that it would cause trouble between the parents.
We agreed to go to have lunch with his parents in Texas and meet
at certain restaurant. That was on Friday. Unfortunately,
DH took us to his parent's house, and his mom decided for everybody
that we were going downtown walking, and not to lunch. DH
accepted his mom's order, even when we knew that putting the parents
together would cause a big argument between everybody. DH
is the most wonderful person I have ever met. I love him for
everything that he represents, he is nice, good hearted, very loving,
and charming. Even when he is not perfect, he is for me.
We match in every single thing, not only in religion, but in values,
music, and way of thinking (with the exception that I like to make
decisions and I always face the problems, and he doesn't.
But, even with that, we agreed to work on that problem and share
our lives together). Returning to Texas, his parents took
their own car, and my mom, DH and I went in DH's. We were
on the freeway, and I started arguing with him, because he couldn't
say no to his mom even when we had already agreed about what we
were going to do. He said that he was tired of arguing, and
I told him, "I can't stand this anymore! How is it possible
that you continue being a baby and get scared of your own mom!"
He became upset, and so did I, and he asked me, "GIVE ME MY
RING BACK!," and I gave it to him. Right at that moment
he stopped the car, and because his parent's car was in front of
us, he went to his mom and gave her the engagement ring. I
told him, "Please take me to the bus station! I want
to go back home!" And he said, "No problem, we will
be going back!" When we arrived home, his parents were
already there in DH's condo. DH and I went inside his room
and started talking. We cried for a long time, and I told
DH that there's nobody in this world that I could love as much as
him. I told him that I couldn't promise that we wouldn't have
arguments, but I did promise to love him with all my heart, to leave
everything for him including my family, life, culture, and that
I promised to be there when he gets sick, to take care of him, to
raise a family, have kids, to cry and laugh together, to support
him for everything he does ... to love him with all my heart.
We cried as we have never cried before. I was crying, but
telling him that I couldn't live without him, and that nothing on
earth could hurt me more than seeing him unhappy. We hugged
each other so strongly, kissed, and told each other that there was
no one in this world we could love but each other. "There's
no hope for me," I told him, "My life would be very dark
and sad without you. You are my sunshine, my happiness, my
love, my life. I would do anything for you." He
said that he loves me with all his heart, and that I was the woman
of his life. He didn't want to break up with me, so we decided
not to break up, but to go to see the marriage counselor.
We went outside the room and told everybody what we decided.
His mom and dad where there, as well as my mom. His dad was
very angry, and told him (pointing his finger to me), "If you
marry this woman, we won't go to your wedding, and we will never
come to see you again!" His mom told him, "You are
very wrong if you get married." His mom told him that
I was not good enough for him, and that love and unity was not enough
for getting married. His dad told him (again pointing to me)
that I wanted to get married just because I wanted a visa to work
in the US. I told him that was not true, because I offered
to move to Mexico with DH, but we decided to stay here. My
mom was there, and she also was arguing with his parents.
She told us, "Love is enough for sharing the life with somebody,
fight for your love, even when these situations happen."
His mom was very hurtful to me and my mom, and his parents threatened
him with not seeing him anymore, not speaking to him anymore, and
not going to the church wedding if he marries me. I told his
mom that we already decided to go see the counselor, and to go the
next day with her. It was a big pressure for DH. I knew
that he loved me, and he told me crying as I've never seen him do
before. After this whole scene between his parents, my mom,
and us, DH told me it was better not to continue with anything ...
he was scared. I was crying, and I couldn't say anything.
His mom told DH that we needed to leave the place, and DH told my
mom and me to leave right away and go somewhere else, like a hotel.
Even when his parents hurt me with such bad words, I respected them,
and didn't tell them anything. For me, parents are sacred,
even when they say bad words or get upset. It was very hard
for us, because I already brought clothes, books, and shoes, because
we were suppose to live together after getting married in August.
His parents were in the dining room while my mom and I started packing.
It was very sad. I was disappointed that DH couldn't face
his parents, and that he was dumping us in the street. But
even when that happened, I forgave his parents, and I still love
him a lot. The first thing that came to my mind was: how could
they be like that when we gave a lot of love to them when they came
to Mexico. I called one of my friends, and he came with his
truck and helped us pack and move. His neighbor also helped
us. More hurtful: every single thing we were packing, DH was
making sure we were not going to take anything else. What
I was seeing was not DH, it was his mom in DH's head. I didn't
say anything. Nothing. Just a big silence while we moved.
DH came in his car to the neighbor's apartment, because a lot of
my things couldn't fit in the neighbor´s truck. DH didn't
say good-bye or anything. I was miserable. My last words
for DH were, "I love you. Please don't give up.
I have supported you, and brought you happiness. Even when
you have had severe psychological conditions, I was there for you."
He argued, saying, "Your temperament is bad." But,
that exact same phrase came from his mom´s tongue. "Look
at her, she has a bad temperament! Your mom was shouting at
me!" I was just staring at her, unable to say a word.
We got dumped in the street. It hurt me to see my mom crying,
but I still love DH. I can't stop crying and thinking about
him. I begged him to go to the priest or counselor, but he
says no. I forgave him for hurting me in such way, and I still
respect him. My mom and I came back to Mexico, and yesterday
I went to the civil register to ask about the annulment or divorce
procedures. They told me that DH and I need to demand the
civil register in Mexico, and that he will need to come to Mexico
to sign documents in the presence of the judge in order to get the
annulment. It's a long, painful procedure. I emailed
DH twice, and called him. On the phone he was cold, very hard.
After that, he emailed me, "Talk to my lawyer," and he
gave me his lawyer's address. He doesn't want to talk to me
anymore, even when he can´t realize that all the situation
is because of the parents, and I´m afraid that his mom is
advising him very badly. I couldn't believe what a monetary
and materialistically destroying mom she is. I love DH even
with his weaknesses, he is the love of my life. And, even
after dumping us in the street, breaking up with me, and not standing
up for me, I forgive him because I love him. I wish you could
talk to him about the situation, because he is no longer talking
to me at all because of his parents ordering him not to. I´m
also afraid about what his mom can do to me. I´m afraid
of being confronted by his parents. They have too much anger
and hate in their hearts. His mother is a very controlling,
manipulating and castrating mother, and she destroyed not only my
husband's life, but my life too. Please help!
Signed - She Destroyed
Both Our Lives
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
I know that you have no desire to hear this, but you need to walk
away. This man doesn't have enough respect for you (love isn't
even an issue here) to stand up for you when his mother badmouthed
you. He dumped you out on the street, and didn't look back.
He is *not* someone you should be with. I am truly sorry that
you have had to deal with this. My heart goes out to you.
But as someone in a marriage with no respect, I have to tell you
- leave now - before you share financial concerns, a greater history,
or even children. While you may be able to forgive these people,
you should not go back. Look for someone who will respect
you and defend you. And count this as a lesson. Good
luck!
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
If your DH can't grow up and stop letting his interfering parents
run his life, let him go. He's not worth keeping. I
know this might be hard for you now, but letting him go will bring
much more happiness for you in the future. You deserve much
better, and I know you'll find it someday. Be glad that you
won't have to have anything to do with these people. Obviously,
they've caused you a great deal of pain. Best wishes for a
brighter and happier future!
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
I know it's hard right now, but he really doesn't want you any more.
He has stated that. You are so much better off without him.
Try to move on. Good luck.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
You are better off without him! Thank God you found out early,
instead of after years and years of abuse. I HATE men like
that, and HE doesn't DESERVE YOU!!!
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
I realize that you must be devastated by all the hurt from your
ILs, and how your DH suddenly chose not to be in your life any longer.
But, have faith. It's probably all for the best. If
your DH is so easily swayed by his mother, or even just the few
minor conflicts you spoke of, then he is NOT the man that you think
he is. He sounds like he has a lot of growing up to do.
And, perhaps he used his mother as an excuse to end your relationship,
because he just wasn't ready for it. Don't let him or his
obnoxious family hurt you anymore. Get your annulment as quickly
as possible, and put him out of your mind. I honestly don't
think that MIL destroyed your lives, even though she obviously contributed
to your problems. Look at it this way - if your DH couldn't
stand the pressure now and be supportive of you when you needed
him, then you are better off that you found out before you were
into this marriage for a lot of years, and had several children.
Count your blessings, go on with your life, and be happy!
Good luck to you.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Run!!! If this boy put you on the street, then he has already
made up his mind. What would happen to you years from now
if his mommy said, "Get rid of her," again? Will
he throw you out with your future children, or just you? This
boy has not shown you any love. One can talk all day of how
much they love you, but it is all in their actions. Again,
he has not shown you any love. If he really loved you, he
would stand up to his parents and tell them off. He would
tell them to go to Hades in a hand-basket if they can not accept
you. If this is how he treats his wife, how would he treat
his wife's children? It sounds like you have a lot of love
for him, but where is his for you? I know you think you will
never find another love like this, and you are right. You
will find one that is even better, and he will love you in return.
You are being abused by this boy and his parents. Don't become
their play toy and set yourself up for their abuse. It will
only get worse, and they have already told you very clearly how
they all feel. Your husband will always be a mommy's boy,
and you will always be last place. Plus, if your husband has
told you to get a divorce and you keep hounding him, then you are
stalking him. You sound like you need to get some help to
sort this out. You can not change him or his parents, only
yourself. Good luck with this. But I see no way to help
you. Just remember that you are a wonderful person, who is
hurting very deeply. I hope you can find peace soon, and move
on. There is a wonderful man waiting out there for you, and
he would never let anyone hurt you. Good luck. You are
too wonderful to be hurt like this.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Give up. You are only asking to spend the rest of your life
in misery if you pursue this. Chalk this up as an "oh
no, not another life lesson" thing, and MOVE ON!
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
RUN!!!!!!!!!!! You are better off. These people, and
that includes your DH, are toxic. And, no amount of love is
worth losing your identity as an individual. You are excusing
all of DH's behavior by saying, "His mother put him up to it."
But, the truth of the matter is, he is aware of the consequences
of his actions. And, if he loved you half as much as you love
him, then he will realize his mistake and grow a backbone.
But, for you to worry what you can do to remedy the situation is
detrimental only to yourself. You did your part. You
told DH that you loved him, and that you will stand beside him forever.
Literally, the ball is in his court. He needs to be the one
to take the next step. Whatever it may be. Good Luck!!!
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both
Our Lives
I don't know how old you are, but you sound very young. I'm
truly sorry that you are in so much pain. Please know that
NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, YOU WILL BE OKAY! I speak from experience,
so I know. I have some advice that may be hard for you to
hear. First off, you cannot hold your husband's parents responsible
for his actions. He is an adult, and he is responsible for
his own choices. They may have influence over him, but nevertheless,
he, and only he, is responsible for how he acts. You say that
even after all that happened, you forgive and respect your husband.
I can't help, but I feel that you are saying that your heart is
broken right now, and you just want things to work out. But,
somewhere, you must be angry and disappointed with him.
You said in your story how "perfect" you were for one
another. I don't know that I believe any couple is "perfect".
We are all human, and we all have faults and problems. Every
couple does, no matter how much they may love one another.
I think that the best thing for you to do is to STOP contacting
your husband, and give it time. If he loves you, then he will
contact you. If he doesn't get in touch, then I'm terribly
sorry, but your relationship was probably not going to last.
Married couples experience a lot of trials and tribulations over
a lifetime, and if this one thing was enough to sunder your relationship
for good, then it was only a matter of time. Although it will
hurt, be glad that it happened sooner, rather than later.
And, remember, you WILL BE OKAY. Even if your future is not
with your husband, you will find someone else. Good luck.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Oh, you poor dear! What a painful way to end a relationship.
Actually, your ex-DH is a coward. I hate to tell you this,
but you cannot make a person do anything. You also cannot
make anyone listen to any words of wisdom, or make them feel anything.
We all do exactly what we want to do. He is not open for any
suggestions of any kind. I have a feeling that he had already
made up his own mind about things, and needed his folks to help
him pull it off. As you stated, he does not handle situations
responsibly. Wasn't he the one who said, "Give me back
the ring?" I really can't blame his parents for this,
since he is an adult. Although they sound like pushy, overbearing,
know-it-all control freaks, he chose to listen to them. He
did what was in his heart. It is quite a coincidence that
he did the opposite of what you had previously agreed upon before
reaching San Antonio. And, it is a little strange that his
parents insisted that you bring your mom, since they did not like
her to begin with. Why were they waiting for you in the condo?
Did he know that they would be there, and not tell you? Have
you ever wondered if any of this was planned out by him and his
parents? I know that this sounds so empty, but time will heal
your wounds, and you will go on with your life. There IS someone
better for you! It sounds like you are a wonderful person,
with much to offer to a man. The right one is waiting for
you, and what a lucky man he is! Someday, you will be glad
that you are no longer connected to this boy-man and his mommy and
daddy.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Do not waste any more time or thought on this spineless man and
his horrible family. If they're like this now, imagine what
married life would be like. If you decide to stay with him,
be prepared for more of the same treatment, for the rest of your
life. Surely you deserve someone who will treat you with the
respect you deserve! Best wishes.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
If your DH doesn't see that his parents are controlling him, no
amount of conversation on your part will change his mind, or make
this situation any better. I'm sorry to have to say it, but
from the things you have said, he sounds spineless. And perhaps
you may be better off without him.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
I'm so sorry this has happened to you. But, how can you love
a man who has treated you this way? You say that your DH is
wonderful, nice, good hearted, and loving. Would a person
with these qualities do these things to another person (a person
he has professed to love)? I don't think so. If he can't
put you first, he doesn't deserve to have you in his life.
You say that he kicked you and your mom out into the street, and
watched while you packed, to make sure you didn't take his things.
I just can't get the idea that you want him back in your life.
You are better than this man and his parents. You deserve
better. I know it's easy for me to say that you should let
him go, and get on with your life, but in the long run, you will
be a lot happier. You will be in my thoughts. Oh, you
should e-mail him your story and the responses. I'm sure there
will be plenty of them, and not one in his favor. Maybe he'll
come to his senses, and realize what he threw away.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Your post makes me very sad - sad to think that women in the year
2002 would be so subservient. No offense, please, I am not
trying to insult you. But, you allowed too much to happen,
and you allowed those ILs too much control. Your DH is part
of the problem (as are the ILs), but so are you. After the
way they treated and talked to you, YOU should be the one walking
out the door. You see, you put up with all of their nonsense,
only to be dumped like garbage anyway. Your niceness didn't
get you ANYWHERE, except to be treated like junk! You should
have walked out - NO BEGGING, just you standing up for yourself
as a person, and standing up for your rights as a person.
ILs like that just want you to be seen and not heard, especially
if that means THEY cant have their way. I could never live
like that. I have practically left my FH when his parents
did a lot less than that to me! If you don't stand up for
yourself, then you will keep winding up in similar situations.
In this world, it is survival of the fittest. And, those ILs
know that you do not believe you are the fittest. You and
your mother should have stood up for yourselves! Why would
YOU be cooking for YOUR own shower? I don't understand that.
I feel badly for you and the pain that you are feeling, but begging,
pleading, and crying will NEVER win him back. Acting like
you are right, and acting like YOU deserve and want better, will
be the only way this man will EVER see what he has lost (if ever).
That is why I don't treat my ILs nicely anymore - because I learned
that the nicer you are, the more they take advantage and try to
control. SO, now I am the one in control. I wish that
one day you will learn this, but I fear that you may never do so.
Let this poor mama's boy go and be with his crazy family.
You will find someone whose family is glad to have you around.
Next time, care more about YOUR needs. Stop caring about everyone
else's! Step into the age of women's liberation. Try
it. It works!
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
I'm sorry to be the one to point this out, but SHE is not the one
who is destroying your life together. Your DH is the one who
decided to cave in to outside pressure. He is the one who
made promises to you and did not live up to them. He is the
one who put you and your mother in the street. If he is not
man enough to stand up for you and have a life with you, you are
better off without him. He could not even keep a simple promise
to help stop an argument between your families. As hard as
it seems right now, you are better off without someone this weak
in your life. When you marry, you make a new family unit with
someone, and they are the ones who come first. Your husband
does not see this. If you are willing to come after his mother,
his father, and probably the family dog, then by all means, continue
fighting for this man. If you want to be the first in a man's
life, then start letting go, get some self confidence, and find
someone else who can put you first. Good luck.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
All you keep saying is, "I respect DH and MIL",
even after everything they have done to you. Did it occur
to you that they disrespected you? Also, you say that whatever
DH has done, you still love him and respect him (even after he dumped
you and your own mother on the street). Would you still respect
him if he started abusing you and cheating on you? Probably.
I congratulate you on leaving that day.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Oh honey, I feel so badly for you. But the "love of your
life" is not strong enough to fight for you. Your life
is precious! I was dismayed at all your, "but I forgive"
statements. We must forgive, but we are not asked to accept
abuse. You have an abusive situation, and things don't seem
as if they will improve. Please see a counselor for yourself,
and start some steps of healing. His family needs help also,
but that is for them to seek out, if desired (I don't think they
will). And, you must find yourself! Be strong!
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
You may love him a lot, and you may believe that he feels the same
way. But he's shown that he is willing to do as his parents
say. That WILL NOT change, and don't think there's a chance
that it will. My advice would be to move on. Someone
who kicks you out onto the street does not deserve to be given another
chance.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both
Our Lives
I feel so sorry that you love this man so much. Move on!
Obviously he will not stand up to his parents. You are far
better off getting on with your life and finding someone who will
back you, no matter what.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
I read your story and felt awful about all that you have been through.
However, I really think you need to step back and try and take a
look at things objectively. As much as you love your husband,
he did not love you or respect you enough to stand up to his parents
and stay with you. How awful of him to just dump you off in
the street!! Truthfully, as harsh as it may sound, you are
SO MUCH better off without your husband. Any man who would
treat you that way does not deserve your love. You don't need
his parents either - life is already stressful enough without having
such awful in-laws. I hope that in due time, you will realize
that you are better off without a husband like that, and you should
move on. You are lucky in that you are still young, have no
kids, and have your whole life ahead of you.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Why would you want to be with a man who doesn't respect you?
He sounds like he is very unstable. Your life would be terrible.
Be happy that you are away from him. He will never take your
part over his mom. Go out and find yourself a hero.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Your love for him doesn't seem like enough now. If he is willing
to throw his relationship with you away, and throw you out on the
street because of his mother, then you are better off without him.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
It's obvious that you are in a lot of pain. And I sympathize.
I can only tell you what I would do in your situation - I would
run like he!!. I realize that you love this man with all that
you are. I have known that kind of love too. But, you
have to try to see through that love, and see the real picture.
This problem is never going to go away, even if you were to reconcile.
I don't think it would last. Love is a powerful emotion, and
it can blind you beyond belief. But, in the end, you need
more than love to make a lasting relationship work. This man's
parents sound terrible, and they seem to have a reasonable amount
of control over their son's life, even though he's an adult.
If you were married, who would you be discussing your life's decisions
with? Your husband, or your parents? I know this is
not what you want to hear, and maybe I'm wrong, but if I were you,
I'd be counting my blessings and moving on. I wish you all
the very best.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
I am not sure how we can help you. I don't think there is
anything you can do now. You just have to wait and see if
DH comes to his senses. I know you love him, but if he should
come to his senses and come back, do not rush into this. You
may have forgiven him and say you respect him, but throwing you
out and acting the way he has during and after it, is very serious.
He showed you NO respect, and I would not blame his parents completely.
DH needs to accept responsibility for his own behavior - whether
it is choosing to be with you or throwing you out. I know
it was MIL's words coming out of him, but he DID say it. And,
it doesn't appear that he cared much about what happened to you.
So, if he comes back, take it very slowly. Obviously the 2
of you need some counseling if you decide to try again. I
would not try to live together again till you are in counseling,
and at the point that DH can stand up to his parents in defense
of his marriage. I am so very sorry that you are surrounded
by immature people. Your in-laws, and your mother - shame
on them for how they have acted. You need to be the mature
one here. And unfortunately, I think that will include giving
DH time to think. Don't move ahead with an annulment or divorce
if you don't want to. Take care of yourself. Good luck!
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Be glad you got out before making children together. This
poor man is totally controlled by his mother and father. I
hope that someday he has the courage and strength to break away.
You cannot force him to do this, even with so much unselfish love
for him. Please, take good care of yourself during this hurtful
time. Don't let him come back and offer you less than the
wedding ring you deserve. Because, if he can't make the break
from his mom and dad, you won't really have enough of him for it
to matter. I will pray for your broken heart to mend soon.
I am so very concerned about you. You are a loving person,
who deserves better.
RESPONSE: She Destroyed Both Our Lives
Once a spineless mama's boy, always a spineless mama's boy.
What's really so great about him? His inability to commit?
His refusal to see anything his mama hasn't shown him? The
ease with which he could discard a woman he claimed to love?
His total disrespect of your mother? His amazing rubber spine?
Understand that after a certain point in life, people have to take
responsibility for their own actions. Old enough to procreate,
old enough to make your own decisions. You have to place blame
where it actually lies - with your DH. How do you really know
that the man who "dumped you in the street" wasn't showing
his true face? Apples don't fall far from the tree.
Thank all that's holy that you made it out of that relationship
without children to be hurt by that evil woman and her clone/son.
And, start putting your life back together. Even if it doesn't
seem like it is right now, you'll find someone who isn't wrapped
around his parents' pinkies, and who loves you truly. Bon
chance.
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