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Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
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Mother-In-Law Stories
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June 28, 2003
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My MIL started out great - I
should have known better. She spent a lot of time doing
fun things with my wife and me up until our marriage.
We went to concerts and shows, etc. No problem.
But, suddenly she became very jealous of our alone time together,
and guilted my wife about how lonely she was, and what kind
of daughter would abandon her own mother, etc. Soon she
was calling in the middle of the night, wanting my wife to come
over when she was lonely. Finally, I put my foot down,
and then it started. My formerly good relationship, with
the rest of the family, fell to pieces, as this woman started
telling enormous lies about me and my relationship with my wife.
It finally came to a head, and I had to literally make my wife
choose between us. I had to either limit MY exposure to
her or, "I'm out of here," I said . My wife explained
that her mother had many issues and that I was not the first
to have to deal with them. She agreed to isolate her mother
until her mother was willing to get some help, and things have
improved a lot since then.
Signed - I Should
Have Known Better
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Please Seek Counseling
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Continue on Message
Board
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Worst gift: The worst
present I ever got was a tea towel with a Canadian Scout printed
on it from when my MIL went to Canada. My DH, on the other
hand, received an electronic personal organizer and a watch.
Signed - Suffering
DIL
Per
the poster's request, no responses collected.
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I am so thrilled that
this site is here! After YEARS and YEARS of misery with
my MIL, I can't believe I didn't find this site sooner!
Here's what's going on: My MIL has been dating a guy who
lives in our town. She refuses, however, to stay with him
(even though she goes on out of town trips with him all the time),
and instead, she stays at our house in the guest bedroom.
She never cleans, cooks or picks up after herself. I have
told her that she's welcome whenever she wants to come, but this
has been going on for MONTHS, and she is here at least 5 days/week.
She has the funds to get an apartment, but says she just wants
to wait to marry this guy. This also changes day to day.
Anyway, my DH is Jewish and I'm Catholic. Every year I cook
Passover dinner for his family at our house. This year she
insisted on having her BF's 8 children over in addition to our
family. Therefore, I was cooking dinner for 21 people.
No problem, except that she refused to take every suggestion that
I made. She fought me on every decision -- even about how
much food to buy. Keep in mind that she's not cooking, cleaning,
or doing anything. Anyway, when it came down to the day
of dinner, I suggested a kids table, and she said, "Well,
I'm afraid that I'll have to veto that decision." IN
MY HOME!!!! In front of my DH, who didn't hear her.
She then insisted on changing the seating arrangements, which
I resisted, but my DH relented. After I cooked dinner, and
all 21 of us were seated at the table to eat, she said to my DH,
"This was very good, DS," and totally ignored me during
dinner. AAARRRGHH!! What's a girl to do? This
is crazy, and I think I've got to get her out of the house before
the rampant negativity makes me insane!! I've done all that
I can to be hospitable, but she just takes advantage of that hospitality
to steamroll everything. DILs of the world UNITE!!!!!!
Signed - Just Too Nice,
I Guess!
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
Great story!
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
Next time, find yourself a real man! Your DH is a wuss.
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
Kick both of them out.
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
Don't cook for her.
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
OMG!! Show her the door. And, if DH interferes, show it to him
as well!!
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
She has got to go. Since DH won't make her go, you may consider
doing some things to help her along, like 5 a.m. vacuuming near
her door, or 10 p.m. vacuuming. Knock on her door each time you
pass by, and then say that it's a habit. You'll try your best
to get rid of it.
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
Your MIL is going to walk all over you as long as you continue
to let her. Take a stand, grow a spine, and tell MIL to treat
you with respect or you'll cut her off. BTW, your DH heard that
comment - he just didn't want to say anything to mommmmyyy.
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
As is often the case, the real problem isn't MIL but that jellyfish
you married. Next time mommy comes to, uh, "visit",
have other plans, and let HIM take care of her.
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
Too nice, yes! You're crazy. You are telling me that she stays
with you 5 days/week, never cleans up after herself, and is incredibly
rude, and you all just let her get away with it? Her butt would
be kicked out MY house so fast. You need to stand up for yourself.
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
If my MIL decided to invite 9 extra guests to a dinner that I
was giving to celebrate a holiday in a religion that I didn't
even practice, and then she gave my DH credit for it all, I would
go stark raving crazy, black out, and wake up in jail awaiting
arraignment on murder charges.
RESPONSE: Just Too Nice, I Guess!
Time for a spine implant! Yes, this woman is imposing on you
in an infuriating way. But you're *letting* her. I'd read DH
the riot act. Tell him that you're no longer going to be MIL's
free hotel, and if he doesn't like it, you're moving out. Set
strict limits on length and frequency of visits. And, when she
gives you orders in your own house, get in her face. She's vetoing
things? I'd have looked at her, incredulously, and said, "Veto?!
What makes you think you get veto power in *my* home? If you
don't like the way I run the place, please rest assured that you
need not stay here." In short, it's long past time to take
matters in hand! Remember: Cowardice is its own punishment;
courage is its own reward.
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I have read many entries
on this site, even in the short amount of time I've known about
it. I was thrilled to learn that evil is not just lurking
in my neck of the woods. I know this sounds horrible, but
I am grateful not to be alone. When DH and I decided to
get married, we were very excited. When DH told is mom,
oh, she was mad. I confronted her, wanting sincerely to
know what the problem was, and if it was fixable. She told
me that if her DS married me, he would be throwing away everything.
He would no longer have any kind of a future. I didn't even
know how to respond. I had never encountered this kind of
behavior. Well, we married anyway, just a few months later.
She wouldn't even speak to me. She had "family"
pictures without me, ON MY WEDDING DAY! She couldn't even
make herself say good-bye. It has been one heck of a ride
since then. At Christmas, there were no gifts for me, but
there were some for DH. There were presents for some of
our kids, and not others, for Christmas, birthdays, and vacation
gifts. It took her (and the rest of his family) seven years
of marriage to acknowledge that I even had a birthday, which is
one week after DH, so it is not hard to forget. All this
is done with a "loving" attitude that is thrown in here
and there for good looks. We have four sons. How do
I teach them to love cautiously? Her response to pregnancies
2-4, "What do I care? I never get to see them anyway."
She lived six blocks away, and never called or came by.
Were we supposed to chase her. Any suggestions?
Signed - Losing My
Mind
RESPONSE: Losing My Mind
Suggestion? Yes, let her stew in her own toxic juice.
RESPONSE: Losing My Mind
Have no contact with her until she can act like a human being.
RESPONSE: Losing My Mind
Your MIL is Wacko! I would distance myself from her. If DH doesn't
like it, he can shove it.
RESPONSE: Losing My Mind
Let's see, MIL told DH not to marry you. She treats you like
garbage and ignores her grandsons. Why do you bother with this
woman? She is not worth your time or effort. Cut her off, and
don't have anything to do with her. She is toxic and determined
to ruin any chance of happiness your family might have.
RESPONSE: Losing My Mind
That's terrible. It sounds just like my MIL. Maybe they are
related! LOL. In our wedding pictures there is not one of us
(not even one with her own son). I feel that people like that
are just rude and very unhappy with themselves. She is probably
very jealous of you, and that is her way of showing it! I can
go on and on, but she is just not worth your time! Keep your
head up and just know that you are a better person.
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Note: To better handle the volume of submissions - stories
received will be posted as early as our resources will allow.
Responses to new stories will be accumulated, and then posted, all
at once, to the original story page about one week later (one set
of responses posted per day). Stories and responses will no
longer move from page to page based on status.
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Working Women Don't Have Wives