Well, I think I have the meanest
MIL. I met my husband in the summer of '99 and got pregnant
in the winter of '00. We got married in March of '00,
and had to live with my in-laws. My FIL is ok, but my
MIL is something else. My husband hasn't exactly been
the best husband, but back then it was even worse. He
used to not come home on pay days, or disappear for days.
He would call my in-laws to pick him up, drunk, from bars at
4 AM, 5 AM, any time. They would leave in the snap of
a finger. They baby him too damn much, anyway. I
would ask them the next day where they picked him up from, and
they would reply, "I don't know." Now, how on
earth can you not know, if you picked him up? That happened
several times. They would cover up for him, and blame
me for the things that he did to me. There were times
when I would be crying out loud, wondering "why all the
suffering", and she would just open my bedroom door (not
knock), just open it and tell me, "You don't have to exaggerate.
He'll eventually come home." She would never hug
me. I didn't have any family here. My mom and dad
were living overseas with my other sister, who was having a
complicated pregnancy. I told them to go with her.
She was delicate and had nobody. All my family is overseas
or in Florida. The only one here is my sister, and she
has her own family to deal with (but, she helps me when she
can). My MIL would hide things from me in the trunk in
their bedroom, like sodas. They would purposely go out
to eat, so they wouldn't buy food. They would bring my
husband leftovers, and asked us to share a bitten taco or burger.
When my son was born, the same thing happened. Now we
fight over the junk that she gives him. She still does
it to upset me, after I've asked her nicely not to. Ice
cream for breakfast, no solid food. She would do my job
as a wife. She would iron his clothes, make him food,
or tell me before I got a chance, "You need to iron his
clothes, make him something to eat. I'm sure he's hungry."
Please reply. Your opinions are greatly appreciated.
There's a whole lot more, but I don't want my husband to catch
me writing about his mother. After all, no matter how
much I dislike her, she is still my husband's mother.
Thank you.
Signed - MIL from
Hell
0
1
0
2
0
3
0
4
0
Strongly Agree
Somewhat Agree
Somewhat Disagree
Strongly Disagree
Please Seek Counseling
Continue on Message
Board
Frequent
Fry Her TM
- squidofthefuture, 2 of 4 needed/Posted: 9-JUL-03
My husband really likes eagles, and he collects
items with eagles on them - figurines, etc. At our housewarming,
MIL gave us an eagle statue. It was fiber-optic, yet still
would have been tasteful if not for the fact that it was perched
on top of what looked like a pile of whipped topping with blue
highlights. It was decorated with pink rosebuds and gold
stars. And, not to mention, 8 pounds of iridescent glitter.
Oh, and it was clutching a glitter accented Confederate flag in
its talons.
Signed - Still Picking
Glitter Off of Everything, After A Year
Per
the poster's request, no responses collected.
If anyone possesses
even the semblance of a civil relationship with the in-laws, you
are blessed. I can't stomach even a moment of conversation
with my MIL. From the instant that I wed her son, she has
been conniving, manipulative, sarcastic, and rude. During
the first years of our marriage, the mere utterance of my name
was too much for her to handle. Instead, she referred to
me as "that woman". That, of course, is when I
wasn't the recipient of some profane name calling. She refuses
to acknowledge my husband and me as married. And, on occasion,
she even suggests people whom she thinks that he should date because,
"there is no shame in divorce". I have had enough.
The day that she showed up and "snuck" our children
out of the house, my husband and I had a heart attack. We
didn't have any notion that she had taken them. For 3 hours
we searched for our children, with the police, only to have her
bring them back and YELL at US, "They are my grandchildren,
and I can take them whenever I wish." I ask, how narcotic
are you to believe that? She has since moved on to casting
insulting remarks about me to my own children. They have
been told petty spiteful things and huge damaging lies.
For example, they heard that I am a thief, a cheat, and a liar.
I cut off contact with her a couple of years ago. The stress
was too much for everyone. Now, she is slowly creeping into
our lives again. I don't care if she speaks to my husband
every day of the week. I just have no desire to deal with
her rubbish and childish behavior. I do not want to speak
to her unless she makes an attempt to apologize for some of what
she has done. Given that pigs will fly before that happens,
I'm not holding my breath. I really don't know what other
choice I have but to ignore her very existence.
Signed - Nom de plume
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
You had the police there. I hope you pressed charges.
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
I can't believe that she actually took your kids! That's kidnapping!
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
You are exactly right not to even acknowledge her existence.
Stick to it!
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
Talk to a lawyer, and get a court order prohibiting her from taking
the children any time that she wishes. Good luck!
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
If my MIL had kidnapped my children, I would have had her arrested
and carted off to jail. Why didn't you press charges, or, at
the very least, slapped a restraining order on her?!!
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
If she took my children, I would have knocked her teeth down her
throat. What is your husband doing about this? Was he just letting
her walk all over you? He!! no, no one other than you and DH
should be removing those kids from the house.
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
Stand your ground before she has your kids convinced that you
are bad and they can come and live with her. Your kids are older,
and may be easily manipulated. In the long run, keep her away
because she may go after your children's children too. You're
a mom, your job is to protect your kids. Your posting helped
me decide to keep my three year old away from my MIL, who acts
the same. The last thing that I want is her putting my daughter
in the middle, the way she does to my DH.
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
I'm sorry, but after KIDNAPPING your children, how could you or
your DH ever have anything else to do with her? Why didn't you
have her charged with kidnapping, and slap a restraining order
on her? What more does she have to do to you before you are convinced
that she is a dangerous, whack job? How the he!! is she telling
your kids lies about you? Does she still have access to them?
Please, stop being a victim and keep that wretched, horrible woman
away from yourself and your family. You and DH need to smarten
up before she causes your kids serious, irreparable harm!
RESPONSE: Nom de plume
I don't think that there are enough words in the English language
to cover the apology that she owes you!! If I were in your shoes,
I would have a restraining order in place. But, since she is
creeping back into your life, and you seem to have no control
over this (you didn't give much detail how she is achieving this),
I would be openly hostile towards her. Sometimes, it is best
to just scare the he!! out of your adversaries instead of putting
on the manners. That way, she knows exactly where she stands
- in a minefield!! It serves her right, too, considering how
she has frightened you and DH in the past. What is wrong with
DH that he wants this horrible wretch in his life?? Maybe a couple
of visits to a marriage counselor is in order to help figure out
why this hateful woman should NOT have a place in your lives.
My MIL is such a clingy,
overbearing b!tch. She is ALWAYS calling my house to make
sure that we are "handling our responsibilities" (that's
the only nice way to put her constant prying). She calls
to see if we got our van fixed, if we ate dinner yet, if I exchanged
my sons t-ball shoes, if I got my sons hair cut, etc. The
list goes ON AND ON - there is NO end. I am nothing but
nice to her, and we answer her every beckoning call. She
had the nerve to say that (after 10 years of being with her son)
if we split up, she is "done" with me - she doesn't
want me around!! I was on fire! I've had 3 major surgeries
in the last 2 years - the last one was a hysterectomy, which I
am not on medication for, but should be. She doesn't even
take that into consideration when she hears that her son and I
are having problems. She thinks that those surgeries are
no biggie. It's none of her damn business anyway!!
But, the thing is that she MAKES it her business. She lives
off of my life - she has no life! This probably sounds like
a lot of rambling, but I could write a novel about her!!
It's hard to make this long story short. She thinks that
I should raise my kids the way she did. I'm NEVER right.
She knows EVERYTHING! She hates my family. Her family
of drug addicted alcoholics is so much better! HA!
I will never be good enough for my kids or her son (in her eyes,
of course). I'm lazy. My house is always a mess (well,
I do have 3 small children that need my attention!). Any
ideas that I ever have suck, and hers are so damn great.
I'm always late. I'm forgetful and unorganized. Her
daughter is so much better than I am, and her kids are so much
smarter and better behaved than ours are. She'll never come
inside my house for more than 5 minutes at a time, but I'm always
expected to go to her house all the time. And, if we don't,
she gets mad. If she has to stop by and pick something up
or drop something off, she'll sit outside and honk until we come
out. And, if she has to get out of her car, she bangs on
the door like she's psychotic!! Seriously. I'm a complete
idiot! And the truth is that I'm NONE of the above, and
anyone who knows me will agree. I'm the opposite of what
she thinks. She is psycho. I've never met such a he!!
bent b!tch. I can top ANYONE'S story. I can complain
to my DH until I'm blue in the face, but that's his mommy.
He will never stand up to her. He's afraid that she'll get
mad! And, GOD knows, she would be infuriated if he or I
ever told her to stay the he!! out of our lives. I just
might explode and tell her one day. The funny thing about
all this is that she has the balls to be nice to my face, and
then to turn around and talk all this sh!t! Very two faced.
She is ruining my relationship. She's ruined all my kids'
parties and holidays by trying to take control of everything all
the time! Yes, she definitely needs to be in control at
all times. I am a good mother, and she'll never admit that.
My Dr. thought that I had ovarian cancer last year, and the only
thing that she said was, "You better go get your picture
taken with the kids so that they'll have something recent,"
you know, in case I were to die. She doesn't get me birthday
presents. She comes over a couple of days after my birthday
and gives me $20 because she says that my FIL wanted me to have
it! Truly. Nothing ever comes from her when it comes
to me. I don't have a problem with my FIL. I just
hate her with a passion. She's a flat out, cold hearted
b!tch, and I would like to find someone here who I can share my
stories with. Trust me, my stories get a lot worse.
Signed - I Hate My
MIL!!!!!!!!!!
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
Your DH is the main problem here. MIL would not be a major problem
if he stood up to her and supported you.
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
Only you have the power to let her control your life. STOP letting
her. So what if she gets mad or your husband gets mad? They
both need to grow up. Good luck. You are going to need it!
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
Your MIL is psycho and out of control. Come to the message board
on this site. There are a lot of great people who have been where
you are, and some who have been lucky enough to get out. That
goes for everyone on this day's page of stories.
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
The next time that she is at your house to pick something up,
don't go outside. If she doesn't knock politely, call the police
and tell them that there is a maniac on your property. At least
you'll be telling the truth.
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
OK, your DH needs to deal with his mother. So, tell him to grow
a set of balls. Your MIL has too much access to your lives, and
that needs to stop. It's not a healthy marriage. If DH doesn't
stand up for you, you need to tell her what is on your mind and
give it to her straight.
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
You need to get your DH to counseling ASAP! Someone is giving
MIL too much information about your lives, and I'm guessing it's
not you. If he won't stand up to her for your family, there's
not much hope there. She sounds absolutely horrible, and if she
came knocking on the door like a madwoman, I would call the police
on her. Good luck!
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
Clearly, you have not had enough of her treatment or you would
ignore her and not allow your children near her. If her son wants
to visit her, he can do it on his own. When she calls to ask
or tell you anything, simply reply, "I was right in the middle
of having sex. Can I call you back in an hour or two?",
or, "Glad you called. I was just explaining to the children
the signs of mental illness and the best way to ignore such creatures.
So I will have to call you back."
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
I think that you need to take a step back and look at what you
wrote. I understand that you are angry and all, but holding on
to that anger will resolve nothing. I was diagnosed with cancer
in March, and my MIL was always trying to give me "helpful"
advice on why my doctors and the hospital that I went to sucked,
and how hers were better, even though I was going to specialists
and SHE has NEVER had cancer. Anyway, I think you need to distance
yourself from her for a while, and your DH needs to act as a mediator
between the two of you and grow some b@lls. There seems to just
be so much anger that if you continue on the same path, nothing
will ever be resolved. There's a struggle going on for who's
the "real" mother to you, your DH, and your children.
I would suggest a family counselor.
RESPONSE: I Hate My MIL!!!!!!!!!!
And, why do you put up with this? Seriously, when things are
this bad, cut MIL (or whoever the person is) out of your life.
MIL is adding no value to your life, and only making you miserable
- why keep her around? The bigger problem is your DH, though.
He took a vow to "forsake all others" when he married
you. MIL is included in that. Why men put up with people who
treat their wives like cr@p is beyond me. Make DH grow a spine,
and get MIL out of both of your lives. You will be much better
off once you solve those two problems.
Note: To better handle the volume of submissions - stories
and responses received will be posted as early as our resources will
allow. Responses to new stories will be accumulated, and then
posted, all at once, to the original story page at a later date (generally,
one set of responses will be posted per day).
DISCLAIMER: All advice on this website is for informational
and entertainment purposes only. All responses are from reader submissions
unless specifically noted otherwise (such as Dr. Terri Apter advice page).
We do not endorse any of the advice. We provide it to you as a service.
We can neither guarantee the soundness of the advice, nor make any claims
as to the outcome of following this advice. We provide it for your
entertainment only. Should you choose to follow any of the advice,
it is solely at your own risk. This is not intended to substitute
for obtaining advice from appropriate sources and/or professional counseling.
We recommend you consult an appropriate professional, counselor, and/or
a trusted advisor before taking any action based on this advice.
B A Squared, LLC and www.motherinlawstories.com make no representations or
guarantees regarding any information dispensed on this site.
Your privacy is important to us. Click here to view our
Privacy Policy.
