When DH and I first started to
date, he told me that his mother would be a pain in the @ss.
At the first encounter she was cold, and I cried all the way home.
But, as my relationship grew, and it was clear that DH and I would
marry, she became worse! SO when we got married, I just
assumed that the problems were over. WRONG! One night
shortly after our marriage, we were over at my in-laws for a Sunday
dinner. After dinner, the whole family sat down to play
a game of dominos. I was sitting about four seats away from
her, next to my new husband, when she rudely said, "Hey,
tell your wife that it's her turn!" I again assumed
that she was just trying to get my attention. Then, when
I went to the bathroom, she asked, "When do you plan to get
rid of your wife? I can't stand her, and you know it.
You should be taking care of me, not her." So, DH basically
told her to back off, and we left. I am not here to say
that it has gotten better. Quite honestly, it is worse!
But, I know that my husband loves me, and that she can just go
chew on some horse cr@p ...
Signed - For All I
Care!
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When DH and I got married,
I decided to have my best friend as matron of honor. My husband's
sister did not get along with me, so I chose not to have her in
the wedding. My MIL was so upset that every time the photographer
took a picture with her in it, she was scowling. To this day
(15 years later) I still can't look at my wedding pictures without
seeing her sour face, and remembering how she practically ruined
my wedding.
Signed - Barely Forgiven
and Certainly Not Forgotten
Per
the poster's request, no responses collected.
My MIL wore BLACK to
my wedding, because to her, my wedding day was a day of mourning,
and she was losing her son!
Signed - MIL Wore BLACK
RESPONSE: MIL Wore BLACK
Well, MIL apparently wore a dress that matches the color of her
heart. Sigh.
RESPONSE: MIL Wore BLACK
Mine did, too. It was a daytime (11:00 am) wedding, so it was that
much more noticeable.
RESPONSE: MIL Wore BLACK
My mother wore black to my wedding because it looks good on her.
I even helped her pick it out. It's your MIL's attitude that was
wrong, not the color.
RESPONSE: MIL Wore BLACK
My MIL wore the same dress that she wore to DH's first wedding some
7 years before, stain and all. No, she didn't get it cleaned or
anything. She always refers to his 1st wife as a b!tch (I've never
met 1st wife, so I have no opinion). So, I'm sure that dress brought
back a lot of lovely memories for her.
My MIL and FIL ran DH's
life every Sunday. At 4 pm they would arrive at our home,
and leave whenever the urge hit them. This wouldn't have been
so bad, except that my husband and I only had Sunday to be together
as a family. Our son never had quality time with his father,
because he was on the road as a truck driver. And, being the
owner/operator, he couldn't take time off, ever!!!!!!!!! He
would sleep until noon, have Sunday dinner early, then they would
arrive. I will never forget the conversation that my MIL and
I had one Sunday. She stated, and I quote, "Well, honey,
whomever my son chooses to be with or take for his wife, I have
to accept, whether I like it or not." I'm not sure that
she realized all that I did do while he was on the road. I
may as well have been a single mother. It was very hard to
teach our son football, basketball, and baseball. I had to
go to all the games, the teacher's meetings, and the school when
he was in trouble, which I think was because he couldn't spend time
with dad like he should have been able to on Sundays. Our
children resented the fact they had to be there on time when their
grandparents were there. It grew to the point where, in the
long run, the visits became a factor that split our family in two.
For seventeen years, this is what happened every Sunday. I
finally decided to let the children know that they didn't have to
be there on Sunday if they had plans. I also decided that
I didn't have to either. If DH didn't care enough to spend
these few hours with us at least every other Sunday, then he could
just spend all the time with his parents. We are divorced
now, and our children remember most of all the Sundays when one
of them would say, "It's almost four. I hope that they
don't show today. It wasn't the entire factor that caused
the divorce. But, neither I nor our children will ever forget
the lack of respect and consideration that my MIL and FIL showed
our family.
Signed - Sunday Worshiper
RESPONSE: Sunday Worshiper
Although it is a moot point now, it wasn't just the lack of respect
of your in-laws. It was your ex-DH's lack of respect for you and
his family, and his lack of cajones, that allowed the in-laws to
continue the Sunday visits. I hope that you're happier now.
RESPONSE: Sunday Worshiper
I hear you. That would be a pain in the @Ss My DH is home every
day at 4, and I spend good amounts of time with him on weekends,
but I still wouldn't want to see his or my parents every Sunday.
If we were to live close to them, I'm sure that they would expect
us to be at their house on Sundays. But, they probably wouldn't
see me but once a month, because I don't like getting into routines
on the weekends that make me feel obligated to sit and talk with
anyone. It's the weekend, for goodness sakes, and it's our free
time to do what we want with our kids and ourselves. Them showing
up during the only time you get to be together isn't much good for
a marriage, never mind for a family. A marriage is what holds a
family together. Sorry, I like the outside family and all, but
I would hate the thought of having to get together with them every
single Sunday. BARF!!!!! I guess I'm not into close knit. I think
it's kind of weird when you can't go without seeing mom and dad
for more than a week after the age of 15.
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