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Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
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Mother-In-Law Stories
June 16, 2004
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My MIL told all the people
in both her family and DH's dad's (her x) side that we did a DNA
test on our son, and that he was not DH's!!! Well, that never went
down. All she does is lie, and I can't take much more.
Signed - On The Edge
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
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Worst gift: Last year's
Christmas gift from MIL was $50. Not bad, right?! WRONG. Her
bratty 13 year old stayed with us for his Christmas vacation (I
might also include the idea that she did not ask if it was ok for
him to stay with us to begin with. So, I had to take time off work
so someone could be home with him, and when she gave me my what
she called a "Christmas Gift", she mentioned that she
thought I might need it for her 13 year old son's meals and activities.
She didn't even give us extra money to keep him, just our "Christmas
Gift". I wish that I had kept my Christmas gift to her, which
was a $150 certificate to a spa.
Signed - Annoyed
( respond to this story )
( I can top this )
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I have been married for 17 years
to a wonderful man, but his entire family is not "so wonderful".
For the past 17 years of my marriage, I have bent over backwards
to help all members of his family - baby-sitting, hospital and
home visits with homemade chicken soup, etc. I have helped through
divorces and homework for college courses. I have cooked, cleaned,
washed, moved, and I have been there for DH's family through thick
and thin, always a phone call away, no matter what they needed
me for or when they needed me. Sadly, I learned a very hard lesson
when my mother died last year. My mom passed away 1 1/2 years
ago from a horrible 6 month battle with lung cancer - she was
57 years old. DH's family is quite large (a lot of aunts, uncles,
and cousins), and I expected that they would come to the church
service to show their support for my family and for myself. My
MIL and FIL came along with my 2 SILs, but the rest of DH's family
never came. I received no phone calls or sympathy cards from
the rest of their family. After 17 years of marriage, I have
attended all marriages, bridal showers, baby showers, etc. I
was very hurt. The best is yet to come. Yes, my MIL, FIL, and
2 SILs came to the church service, but when the service ended,
so did their love and support. No one called or stopped by to
see how I was doing. In fact, two weeks after mom died, I called
my MIL, sobbing, because my heart hurt so much. She interrupted
my tears and told me, "It's getting late, and I need to take
a shower now." I hung up the phone, stunned, and called
my SIL. I was shocked and sobbing, and I asked her if she could
come and share a cup of coffee with me, because I was so lonely
and sad. My SIL told me,"Well, maybe I will come over next
week, or something," and then she hung up the phone. I heard
nothing from them since about my mother's death or my grief.
A month after my mother's death, my son had major surgery, and
none of DH's family came to the hospital to visit, nor did they
call. He was in a local hospital for 5 days. My head was spinning
from grief about my mom and worry about my son - it was awful.
There is more! I have read about the awful gifts and the awful
things that ILs have done. Every Christmas since we were married,
my MIL has given used gifts to JUST ME. I have received wrapped
gifts, including a scratched and dented pill box, used nail polishes,
used lip balm, broken and chipped dishes and vases, cheap dollar
store items (I now have 5 plastic measuring cups - one for each
past 5 years), and items that she has had displayed throughout
her house. She has favored the other grandchildren. For instance,
she decided to deliver homemade chocolate chip cookies to another
grandchild at the exact time my MIL and FIL were to be at the
church for my son's confirmation. The confirmation was talked
about and planned a month ahead of time, no excuse! She actually
had the nerve to show me the pictures that she took on her digital
camera of the other grandchild holding the plate of cookies.
The pictures on the digital camera had the date and time on them,
which is how I know that that was where my MIL and FIL were (instead
of being at the church)! I gave my MIL a collectible porcelain
doll that I had since I was 8 years old, because she told me that
she could find out for me if she was worth any money. I just
got her back this week, and my doll is ruined. She stinks, is
filthy, and is sun damaged. My one SIL is a prize for sure.
She will actually interrupt my conversations mid-sentence and
change the subject, or she will walk away from me when I am mid-sentence!
When she moved into her new house, I called her and planned to
stop by the next morning for an hour for coffee, and to give her
the housewarming gifts that I had bought. It was a week before
Christmas. We planned for 9 AM, and she told me that I would
have to excuse her if she was still in her pajamas. When I arrived
at the door, hands full of housewarming gifts, her DF answered
the door and told me that my SIL was not home. She had decided
to go Christmas shopping instead! DH has had enough. He went
up to his parent's house last night to confront them about the
17 years of cr@p that they have handed me despite my efforts to
forgive, forget, and to try to be a loving and caring DIL. Well,
as you probably guessed, they both had an excuse for all of their
bad behavior. For family events that they hurtfully ignored,
they said that they can't possibly be in two places at once.
About the gifts that I receive, they said that they just don't
have a lot of money. About the baby-sitting, moving, etc., well,
they all thought that that's what I wanted to do, and it is not
their fault that I overextended myself. About my mom's death,
and not being there, well, my MIL doesn't recall ever saying anything
like that, and I acted like everything was fine, so they all thought
that I didn't need anything. About my SIL's bad behavior, well,
she was raised to be selfish, and that's just the way she is.
The list goes on and on. DH and I have a wonderful marriage.
The only arguments that we have had for 17 years have been about
his family. I feel sorry for him being put in such a hard place.
I have discovered that family is defined not by those who are
blood related, but by those who you allow into your life who show
you dignity and respect, and who can not only graciously receive
your love and caring, but who can give it back unconditionally
and with desire. A word of advice to all new DILs - please say
something right away to your ILs if something is said or done
that is out of line. Show them from day one that you are willing
to be a loving and caring DIL, but that you demand respect and
dignity in return. Save yourself from the 17 years of heartache
and pain that I now have. Famous last words "If I only knew
then what I know now".
Signed - I Will Hurt No More
( here is my story )
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Note: To better handle the volume of submissions - stories
and responses received will be posted as early as our resources will
allow. Responses to new stories will be accumulated, and then
posted, all at once, to the original story page at a later date (generally,
one set of responses will be posted per day).
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Working Women Don't Have Wives