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Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
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Mother-In-Law Stories
September 4, 2004
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AUGUST
2004
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SEPTEMBER
2004
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Worst gift: On Christmas
morning, my DH and I, were opening gifts from our relatives.
Fortunately, my MIL lives 1001 miles away. Anyway, my turn
came to open up my gifts from her. I was wondering how she
could top last year's stupid gift of a self examination card from
her gynecologist's office, but she did. I was handed a small
wad of a present. I was thinking that it probably was a
used handkerchief. I wish. It was a used pair of underwear.
I just stared in disbelief. USED UNDERWEAR? When my
DH asked her about them, she said," Oh, I thought they were
hers." YEAH, RIGHT. They were about 3 sizes too
big. They were from my DH's ex-girlfriend. She knew
it, and did it on purpose, because I told her that she couldn't
come down for Christmas, because the last time she came, she not
only invited herself, but then she stayed for three weeks.
That is another story. Anyway, yes, I received my DH's ex-girlfriend's,
big, crusty, panties.
Signed - Big And Crusty
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Strongly Agree
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Somewhat Agree
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Somewhat Disagree
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Strongly Disagree
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Please Seek Counseling
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Continue on Message
Board
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Worst gift: My DH visited
his mom within the past year. She sent him home with a popular
"How to Diet" book for me. Since the first time that
I met her, she lectured me on exercise and dieting. I was very
trim when I met her, and had put on 25 lbs. within 4 years after
meeting her. Most of the weight was from muscle. Needless to say,
I donated the diet book to a coworker, who had wanted to buy it.
Signed - Fatso
Per
the poster's request, no responses collected.
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I feel so unwelcome in
my MIL's home. Whenever I come over and try to chat, she gets
up and leaves in the middle of my sentence. We were over the
other day for brunch, and she was sitting next to me. As soon
as another spot opened up, she got up, took her stuff, and sat at
a different table. Could she be a little more obvious?
Signed - Unwelcome
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
Respond in kind - ignore her as well whenever the opportunity arises.
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
So, don't go there. If she has made it clear that she does not
have the time of day for you, why bother with her?
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
And, WHY do you keep going over to your MIL's? She obviously doesn't
want to have a relationship with you, so why bother? Only go to
your MIL's if your DH is going. Don't engage in conversation with
her. Why put yourself through that?
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
She will continue to be obvious about it if you keep letting her
get away with it. She wants no contact with you or her son. Stop
going to her house or inviting her to yours.
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
What a b!tch. My advice: Just don't go there anymore! Let your
DH visit her if he wants to. He doesn't have to drag you along
in the process. You're only going to get hurt, and obviously you're
not going to get very far with this stubborn woman. Other alternatives:
Tell your DH to talk to her about her behavior, or talk to her yourself
(and actually follow her when she just leaves). Maybe then she'll
finally listen. Good luck.
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
The answer is obvious - stop going over there. Stop trying to chat
with her, stop even recognizing her existence. She's having fun
hurting your feelings, and you're just going along with it. STOP.
And, if your DH wants to know why you won't go over there anymore,
tell him that she's made it clear that you're not welcome.
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
Treat her the same way that she treats you. Do not sit near her,
nor talk to her. If you do have to sit next to her, angle yourself
ever so slightly so that she sees nothing but your back. No matter
what she asks for or says, do not respond until she has repeated
herself several times. Then, look at her and ask her whether or
not she is speaking to you. When she gives you a reply, just turn
your back on her again. I've used this method before, and it works.
The person in question can't stand being treated in this method,
and usually comes around. If not, it's no big loss. Good luck.
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
Where is your DH when all this happens?! He should call his mother
on this right away. If it happens one more time, in a loud voice
say, "Why don't you like me MIL?" Then, refuse any more
invitations to her house. If your DH just sits there and let's
this happen, you have far more issues with DH than your MIL. Make
sure to tell DH that he is never to leave you alone in her house,
or anywhere, with her. I am more mad at your DH than your MIL right
now. GRRRR!
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
If you can screw up the courage, why not take your MIL aside and
tell her that you sometimes feel a bit unwanted when you're around
her, and that this disappoints you, because you'd like the opportunity
to form a nice relationship with her. The worst thing that can
happen is that she will dislike you for speaking up. Unless you
feel that that 's worse than being ignored and treated without much
respect or consideration, you have little, if anything, to lose.
Maybe you can ask DH what he thinks about the situation first.
DON'T ask him to get involved, at least not right away, but DO ask
him if he has noticed your MIL's behavior towards you and why he
thinks it might be. Maybe he'll have an insight that will help
you build warmer relations between you and your MIL without your
even having to talk to her. It would be easy to just say, "Screw
her," and believe me, I know how hard ILs can be. But, it
might be nicer if you can do something to improve the situation,
even if it is her fault that it needs improving. Best of luck.
Remember, with or without MIL's attentions, you are a rightful part
of the family. But, fortunately, you are married to DH and not
MIL!
RESPONSE: Unwelcome
It's hard to know how to respond without more background, but as
a general rule there are two possibilities. One is that there's
something you've done to offend her. If so, you need to find out
what it is and make it right. The other possibility is that she's
just one of those impossible people whom you'll never please. If
that's the case, I strongly suggest that you stop trying to gain
her approval. Come to terms with the fact that you don't have the
MIL-DIL relationship you want, and just leave her alone. Otherwise,
you're just setting yourself up for disappointment.
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Note: To better handle the volume of submissions - stories
and responses received will be posted as early as our resources will
allow. Responses to new stories will be accumulated, and then
posted, all at once, to the original story page at a later date (generally,
one set of responses will be posted per day).
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Working Women Don't Have Wives