|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
Mother-In-Law Stories
September 19, 2004
|
|
|
|
|
AUGUST
2004
|
|
S
|
M
|
T
|
W
|
T
|
F
|
S
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
SEPTEMBER
2004
|
|
S
|
M
|
T
|
W
|
T
|
F
|
S
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 |
I just want to say hello to everyone
and I'm glad to find a web page dedicated to all the whacko MILs.
Well, I'll start from the beginning and make it somewhat short,
if I can. My ILs have been divorced for 5 years. DH
said that when he was little (since 14), he had to work so that
he could give his mom and dad the money, and yet they never took
it from his brother. After the divorce (MIL and FIL), DH
lived with his dad (we weren't together at the time), and his
dad would still take money from him, since he said that he didn't
have any. But, yet, he'd go out to eat 2-3 times a day.
We have been together for almost 4 years. We have a house,
and I recently had a baby boy. MIL started to get weird
and started calling herself mom X (X is the last name).
Whatever! After I had DS, and even before then, she moved,
and didn't meet GS until he was 3 months (she would come down
and visit BIL all the time). After we had DS, she wanted
to (supposedly) visit more, but before I was pregnant we only
saw her on holidays, and yet she'd come down and visit BIL approximately
once a month or more. We'd never know about her visits until
BIL told us that she came to visit. Anyway, this is her
third time coming into town (we now live next door to BIL) since
DS was born, and she had seen DS twice before. Every time
she held him he cried. Well, this third time my mom happened
to keep him that night, so DH and I had a night out to ourselves,
but MIL called from BIL's to see if we could come over and visit.
She was watching their kids for the night. SO, we went over
there and she said, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Where's the baby?"
DH's birthday was the day before. BIL's birthday was THAT
day, a day apart. DH said, "DW's mom is watching him
for the night." She gave the dirtiest look and yelled,
"WELL, WHEN AM I GOING TO SEE THAT BABY?!" DH
got angry and said, "MOM, DON'T BE RUDE!" because she
was looking right at me. She started to tear up, as if it
was an act, but, yet, she was mad and said, "He won't even
know me." Anyway, we got into this whole discussion
on how she was in the area for a while and we've been busy, and
we never saw her before the baby, so why does she want to see
us now?! I told her that it seems like BIL is the favorite,
and so is his first child (BIL has two kids). She admitted
that she had a favorite son (BIL) and a favorite grandchild (the
first grandchild). She said that he was the first grandchild,
so she can't help it - *rolls eyes*. I was shocked that
she admitted it! I said that it was rude, and it was no
wonder she didn't call on DH's birthday (the day before).
She said that she was sorry, she forgot his birthday. How
can you forget his birthday, they're a day apart!!? Anyway,
she also had the nerve to say that, since I have a house now,
I should stay home more often and not be at my mom's all the time.
Grrr. She's not allowed to see DS anymore. Yet, she
called a couple of weeks ago to ask why she's not allowed to see
him, even though she was told a MILLION times. After this,
she called BIL to tell him how horrible we are. So, BIL
called here and YELLED at DH. He told him to leave me and
take the baby. WTF?! Since then, DH and BIL haven't
spoken - and it's been two months. Keep in mind that we
live next door. Fast forward to today. MIL sent DH
two cards. I opened them up, and it seemed to be 4 cards
in all - 2 for DH for Father's Day (although he didn't send her
anything), another tiny card-like thing for him, and THEN the
thing that made me mad. A card from DS for DH. She
has NO RIGHT to do that. That's MY job! In DS's card
it said something like, "Lucky to have you," with YOU
underlined. I know what she was hinting. On DH's cards
from her it said, "From YOUR MOM", and on the address
line it said "MOM X". I know what she was hinting!!
For my baby shower she got me used clothing. As for the
divorce, MIL said that she and FIL would even fight because she
would have a favorite. FIL admitted this, and said that
she would tell her to treat them both the same. YET, when
we told him that MIL said that she had a favorite GC, he said,
"It's because he's the first grandchild." DH piped
up and said, "Well, I was firstborn and I wasn't the favorite!"
He said "True." He was taking her side, though.
**Sigh**. What kind of parents are these?!
Signed - topo
|
0
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
0 |
|
Strongly Agree
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Somewhat Agree
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Somewhat Disagree
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Strongly Disagree
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Please Seek Counseling
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Continue on Message
Board
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I've been married for
a couple of years, but my DH and I are not in a hurry to have kids.
Well, my MIL has gotten into the habit of saying that she wants
to have a grandchild ASAP, because she is sure that she will die
within the next 2 years. The lady is a loon.
Signed - Having A Baby
In 3 Years
Per
the poster's request, no responses collected.
|
|
I visited my MIL this
past weekend, and there were two odd problems. 1) MIL
was strange with my 2 year old daughter, giving in to all of her
demands most of the time, then deciding that she'd had enough.
Of course, some extensive tantrums were the result. My MIL
also likes to pay so much attention to, and be so intense with,
my DD so that she can be the "one the baby loves most".
Weird, but hey, I don't doubt my kid's love, and I am surely not
going to compete for the affection of the child. As far as
I am concerned, the MIL should get all my DD's attention when we
visit. But, the inconsistent leniency is not really fair to
a toddler. The second problem was rotten old food. Food
was left out for far too long in the heat. And, there was
sour milk that I was assured was ok. It was not OK, and DD
had diarrhea all day. OK, I will travel to another state with
my own food and never trust what comes out of her fridge, but how
to address the weird behavior issues? After we left MIL, I
got my normal toddler back immediately, since she was no longer
hyped up beyond recognition and she knew what to expect. BTW,
it is standard in that family that no one contradicts the bully
MIL.
Signed - Nobody But Me
Says Boo to My MIL
RESPONSE: Nobody But Me Says Boo to My MIL
Start contradicting your MIL.
RESPONSE: Nobody But Me Says Boo to My MIL
While I appreciate the fact that you don't want to deny MIL the
time with your DD during her visits, your first responsibility is
to protect DD from the over-stimulation that her GM seems to bring
on. Limit GM's access to DD.
RESPONSE: Nobody But Me Says Boo to My MIL
Tell MIL that you don't mind her spoiling DD slightly, but she has
to be consistent. Tell objecting family members that that is your
standard, and it is the only one that counts where DD is concerned.
RESPONSE: Nobody But Me Says Boo to My MIL
Whether it is"standard" or not, your DH needs to stand
up for his family, you, and your child when his mother behaves inappropriately.
And, I would tell/have him tell your MIL that you won't be able
to visit her at her home anymore because she poisoned your child
with rotten food.
RESPONSE: Nobody But Me Says Boo to My MIL
Easy, don't visit. Is pleasing your MIL and giving in to her demands
really worth making your child sick? Why did you give her the milk
that you knew was bad? Because MIL told you to? What if next time
it's not diarrhea, but something worse? Your baby obviously has
problems with the woman, hence the temper tantrums. So, why torture
her for the sake of family peace? It's time to set priorities and
tell MIL that you will not be visiting with GC again.
RESPONSE: Nobody But Me Says Boo to My MIL
Before your ILs further aggravate you, you'd better get your DH
to speak up on your behalf. Take it from me, I've been married
28 years with in-laws that are truly from he!!. My DH never spoke
firmly in defense of his wife or children to his parents. Things
only get worse. If you plan to stay married, and don't want a life
of living he!!, I strongly suggest that you tell your man to politely,
but FIRMLY, support you and defend you in front of his family.
If he doesn't, they'll keep taking more advantage of you, and hurting
you more and more. Been there.
RESPONSE: Nobody But Me Says Boo to My MIL
How to address the weird behavior issues? Hmm, don't take DD to
see her so often. Failing that, your best bet is to continue to
be the one who stands up to bully MIL. It is perfectly all right
to overrule MIL. For example, if DD changes her mind three times
in one minute about what she'd like for pudding, and MIL brings
out all three choices, you CAN say, "No, you're not having
blancmange AND jelly and a banana. You can have ONE of them. Now
choose." If MIL doesn't like it, tough cookies.
|
Note: To better handle the volume of submissions - stories
and responses received will be posted as early as our resources will
allow. Responses to new stories will be accumulated, and then
posted, all at once, to the original story page at a later date (generally,
one set of responses will be posted per day).
|
|
|
Working Women Don't Have Wives