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Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
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Mother-In-Law Stories
September 20, 2004
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AUGUST
2004
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SEPTEMBER
2004
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Two nights ago, DH called FIL
to come over to visit, since he was just at BIL's for a long time,
and DH thought that he would come over. FIL said that he
was too tired, and DH said that he sounded kind of grumpy, saying,
"I would have liked to have seen you and DS the other day,"
(they had professional pictures done of all the boys - but we
didn't go). DH said, "Yeah, I know." He
said that he'd call him back the next day for a visit. So,
last night, DH called FIL to see if he wanted to visit, and FIL
said that his back hurt (he whines about everything, and wants
everyone to feel bad for him all the time - looooong story) because
he was getting in and out of DH's grandfather's car all day.
So, he wouldn't come over. He also said that he's VERY disappointed
in DH for not seeing him for pictures. Whatever. Last
night, DH and I had a talk about everyone in his family.
He said he'd like to get along with BIL again so that he could
see his nephews. And, then he started blaming it on me.
I NEVER said anything bad about BIL. I even returned a hello
from DH's nephew a few weeks ago, and BIL told nephew to stop
talking to me. He and SIL were also giving dirty looks to
my family. BIL is the one who is actually mad, because we
no longer have any contact with MIL. Is there any way of
making things back to normal with them? I have no interest
in talking to BIL. DH said that I should apologize to MIL,
and the same with BIL. But, we're both too stubborn.
What did I do?!? We both ignore each other, except for the
time (about two weeks ago) when they left their puppy outside,
and it was a really bad storm, hail, wind, etc. I brought
the puppy to their house, and they said, "Oh. I forgot
that he was outside!" Yeah. Sure!
Signed - Topo
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Strongly Agree
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Somewhat Agree
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Somewhat Disagree
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Strongly Disagree
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Please Seek Counseling
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Continue on Message
Board
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I have been with my DF
for 6 years. We are on the verge of killing his mother.
A couple of years ago, they bought a camper on the coast, about
an hour and a half away, which FFIL and DF use to go fishing during
the summer. FMIL will sometimes go with them. Last year,
they told us that, after we get married next year, they are going
to move to another state and get a house there. They plan
to travel around the country, and said that we could buy the house
from them. FMIL would make little comments here and there
that she still wants to "have a base with my stuff".
Translation: She thinks that we're going to buy the house
from them and store her cr@p there. Not happening. Well,
all of a sudden FFIL and FMIL are not getting along. She has
lost her mind completely. She is constantly complaining about
the boat that they bought last year (that she encouraged them to
get). And, now she doesn't want to move, let alone sell us
the house. We have been planning to buy the house and do a
few remodels, like updating the kitchen. She has been yelling
at DF nonstop about how he needs to get a real job (he fishes in
the summer, commercially, and is in school during the fall and winter),
and she is constantly giving him miracle cures that she finds in
the newspaper about diseases that he doesn't have. After the
wedding, we are planning to move 2 1/2 hours away . P.S.
She will not be allowed to baby-sit any of my children, because
I saw her with her other 2 grandsons (ages 3 &7) riding on the
hood of the riding lawnmower. And, then there was the time
that she was in the house while the 7 year old was in the pool outside!!!!
Signed - Completely Frustrated
Per
the poster's request, no responses collected.
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DH and I decided not
to let MIL see DS anymore, when she said that she had a favorite
GS, and that she "can't help it". He was the firstborn
grandson. She said that she didn't love DS as much because
she didn't know him. So, what about BIL's other child?
She obviously didn't tell BIL that she only really likes one of
his kids. Not only that, but she admitted that she and FIL
would fight because she favored BIL and said that she got along
with him better. FIL admitted to this, and said that he had
to coach her on how to treat both DH and BIL. He suggested
that we "coach" her on how to treat DS, and how to love
him and treat them the same. NO WAY!! I'm NOT coaching
her!
Signed - topo NOT Coaching
Her!
RESPONSE: topo NOT Coaching Her!
Since when are YOU responsible for MIL's behavior? FIL wants you
to "coach" her in order to get her off his back and out
of his hair. Sorry, FIL, you married her, you deal with her!!
RESPONSE: topo NOT Coaching Her!
Yeah, it stinks that your MIL plays favorites. But, it's no reason
to cut contact with your child. You can coach her, if you love
your child enough to swallow your stubborn pride. I have read your
other stories. It does seem that the woman is trying to make some
effort. It's too bad that you are he!! bent on using your child
to punish your MIL. You are only hurting him.
RESPONSE: topo NOT Coaching Her!
"Coach" an adult on how to treat a child? Huh? Your
responsibility is "coaching" your children on proper behavior,
not their grandmother!
RESPONSE: topo NOT Coaching Her!
A lot of people do have (it's a lousy word for it) "favorites".
There are people who click, and people who don't click without more
effort. The problem shouldn't be having a favorite. It's saying
and acting like you have a favorite that is the problem. If the
MIL was willing to be coached, I would coach. There's nothing here
that says that she doesn't love her grandchildren. If there is
love there, then it's something to build on. Making sure that none
of the children are hurt is one thing, and a good thing. Insisting
that people feel the way that you demand that they feel is just
your immature foolishness. Grow up!
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Note: To better handle the volume of submissions - stories
and responses received will be posted as early as our resources will
allow. Responses to new stories will be accumulated, and then
posted, all at once, to the original story page at a later date (generally,
one set of responses will be posted per day).
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Working Women Don't Have Wives