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Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
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Mother-In-Law Stories
February 13, 2006
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JANUARY
2006
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FEBRUARY
2006
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After reading a story
here I collected some courage and thought I would also put my story
together and see what people around the world have to say about
it. Some background first - I have a wonderful DW. I love her
so much. I have left my country and settled in my DW's country
because of our love. We live very close to my the ILs (walking
distance). So, this is how all the trouble started. They think
that because DW is their first born and they live so close to us,
it's their right to interfere in my plans any time they want. Both
MIL and FIL are so forceful. If they decide something, we (kids,
DW and I) must comply. If I don't, my FIL will feel bad. Nobody
cares if I feel bad. I have tons of stories about things that happen
almost every day. I fail to understand why my DW forgets that her
first priority should be me. I always give her first priority.
My parents live in a different country altogether, so there is no
question that they would bother my DW. Moreover, if I become serious
over some matter and have some serious words with DW , she feels
that I am not social, and I that hate her mother without any reason.
MIL is fond of going to operas. It's a nice cultural thing, I agree,
and I also went with them many a times. They are so crazy about
it that they even see the same show 3-4 times in 6 months. In my
opinion, it's a waste of money and time. Initially I used to go
with them and I have seen all the major operas with them. The same
show runs 4 times a year. Each show means that you have to spend
4 hours of your evening there. Now DW and I both are working, middle
class professionals. After a long, tiring day I would prefer to
spend time with DW. But, her mother wants to see the opera and
has already bought the tickets in advance for herself and DW weeks
before. Of course, this was done without my knowledge. So, on
the day when they both know that they have to go, they will go.
I will get the following surprise: SURPRISE, you have to spend
4-5 hours alone this evening at home. Time that you were actually
planning to spend with your wife at home!! We are married and didn't
plan kids yet. I am sure MIL is using the liberty that my wife
is her DD, and she has rights on her DD. But, she forgets that
now I am also here as her life partner, and we may also have some
plans together. Many a times my wife cancels our plans, as she
sees a plan in my MIL 's family. Then, we have to adjust our plan
to fit to their requirements. Many a time they become so possessive
that I feel so alone. It seems like DW is unable to understand
this, and when they both are together they feel as if they are the
best in the world. They even tease me. Many a time I feel offended,
and I later discuss it with DW. We both go to sleep in a bad mood
because DW never wants to listen anything against her mother. Personally,
I would have no problem with my DW's parents if they weren't always
possessing my wife, so that DW and I cannot come close. This has
really created serious problems, as our new married life is also
dull. It's been months since we did something together as a couple.
It worries me. I sometimes want to shake them and say, "Why
the %&* don't you leave my DW and me alone, so we can also
plan something together?" I haven't seen my parents in years,
because they live in a different country. MIL comes to our flat
almost every day. I have no problem with this, as long as my program
with my DW doesn't clash with their program. But, mostly I find
that DW changes our programs to fit to her parents' programs. I
go nuts (pulling my hairs off my head myself). Many a time my MIL
will cook more food and give some to DW. DW takes this as an opportunity
so that she doesn't have to cook. She will eat it and will force
me also to eat, even if I don't like it and plan to eat something
else. I don't drink, but my FIL drinks and smokes quite often.
Since I have come to their country because I love their DD, he has
made me drink. I never drank before. Now I drink every kind of
alcoholic drink. He even made me feel (among his relatives) that
if I don't drink, I am not a man. He pushed whiskey glasses into
my mouth. After I got drunk, they felt great. "Look, now
our SIL is in our control," and now they can do whatever they
want. This is an ongoing activity, and still I can't find the solution.
This makes me HIGHLY obliged to my great ILs, so that we don't say
NO to them when they need our help. There should be a limit to
everything. Sometimes if this happens, it's an accepted social
behavior. But, if this forcing process crosses its limit so that
I can't cook or expect my wife to cook a food which I like, then
it's crazy. I also note that whenever DW and I are away from our
city together, we have no problem. We also lived together in different
countries for months and I think that those were our golden moments.
The moment that we come back to our home, unfortunately the whole
bunch of sh!t starts. DW and I feel that it is very hard to live
our day-to-day life together because of MIL. I would be grateful
if some of you experts could share your experience and knowledge
to help us live our lives peacefully. Tons of thanks in advance.
Signed - DW Is First
Born
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
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MIL called to ask what
I had gotten my nieces for Christmas. I told her, and we discussed
what else they might want. We had this conversation numerous times,
as I had made my purchases in October. This morning, when I called
to see how my niece's morning had gone, their mother informed me
that my MIL had duplicated my gifts! She went out and bought the
exact same items that I had. She is just weird. Why on earth would
she do that?!?!? I think that she just does things to make me angry!
Signed - Unoriginal in
The Midwest
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
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Worst gift: MIL gave
DH $1,000 for Christmas. She gave me a jar of jam, hand cream,
and a recycled dish.
Signed - Recycled
( respond to this story )
( I can top this )
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Working Women Don't Have Wives