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Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
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Mother-In-Law Stories
January 9, 2007
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DECEMBER
2006
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JANUARY
2007
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Worst gift: If my story
was a joke, it would be hilarious. It would top even the most uncomfortably
funny Seinfeld episodes (the show in which the term "regifting"
was originally coined). The short story is: My ILs have been gifting
us used junk since we got married 8 years ago. Each time Christmas
and birthdays roll around, sometimes an odd box shows up on our
door. I believe the postage cost more than the contents of the
box. It was really bad this year. Our newborn son received a used,
chewed-on board book that clearly had either spit-up or vomit on
the back cover. The longer story: My MIL has worked at a resale
shop for many years, participates in estate liquidations, and has
an uncanny way of assigning a tax-write off or other value to any
old piece of junk, and then "purchasing" it for FREE because
she claims to have donated an equal amount of stuff to the store
or given time in exchange. I have witnessed this myself. I just
never imagined that I would be on the receiving end of her endless
"how can I pass off this junk to someone else and still come
off as a hero?" scheme. That it's used is fine. It may have
some use, and might even be handy (in recent years they *have* gotten
a bit better-targeted about the types of junk they find). Really.
I've gotten used to it. This year, they gave me a really nice wine
kit - corkscrew, foil knife, etc., etc. Even if it was 10 years
old and used to belong to someone who has since DIED. HOWEVER.
I CANNOT come to grips with the fact they WRAP THIS UP and pass
it off for birthday presents or, worse, create a pile of neatly
wrapped packages under the Christmas tree. Again, the paper likely
cost them more than the contents of the item. I recall that Xmas
2003 I was given an old, 1967 book on auto repair. I looked outside
at my then very recent car and asked them, "Hmm.. I wonder
if this book covers fuel injection vehicles??" Nope. It strictly
discussed carburetors. On my wife's birthday she had actually forgotten
that they'd left a few wrapped boxes in our guest room when they
came to see us in February. The boxes were marked for her birthday
(6 months later). It turned out to be an old, tattered blouse that
looked heavily worn/soiled, smelled awful, and was SIX sizes too
large for her. Also, some old, broken picture frame. DW ended
up calling them a week after her birthday, having not received a
card or a phone call, and they expressed that they couldn't call
her because their vehicle had broken down on their way to look at
a time-share. That aside, I've largely gotten over the fact they
are determined to give us junk each and every year. Once you finally
get to that point, you simply stop caring about the cr@p they send
you. But, this past Christmas (2006) is where it simply became
unacceptable. This past year my wife and I had a baby boy, our
first. It is also my ILs' first grandchild, so I would logically
think that they'd be ecstatic, joyous, grateful and excited. They
might even buy new items for him. Not that much, just a few things.
But NO. More and more used junk. SOILED CLOTHING that smelled
like it had been hanging in my MIL's resale shop for YEARS. At
our baby shower, we received an item in my FIL's parents' name,
from my MIL. It was a soiled, dirty-smelling snowsuit. My wife
persuaded them in a very careful manner to ask for books instead,
because books are fairly safe, right? Even if they're used? WRONG.
Try this: An old board book, copyright 2001, used and scratched
up, with dried-on milk/spit-up/vomit on the back! It wasn't even
wiped down! And they expect their FIRST and potentially ONLY grandchild
to PLAY WITH and TEETH on this junk? Now the climax to the story.
Reach for the punch line? Here it is! They. Just. Bought. A. Second.
House. For. Seven. Figures. And what's worse? I came from a relatively
poor family, yet my own parents ALWAYS found a way to buy us new
gifts, even if there weren't many. A few NEW gifts are worth more
to me than 20 OLD JUNK items. It's about quality (and sanitation),
not quantity. As a new parent, I simply refuse for my son to grow
up thinking that his maternal grandparents think he's worth less
than the broken-concrete fixer-upper they just purchased with money
they don't have. This is where I lost it. I outright confronted
them, and, unfortunately, it has come back with them blaming us
for it all. My MIL insists that the books came from one of her
good friends, and she "trusts the source", that I have
all of the facts wrong, and further, I am way out of line for questioning
her about the items that she gifted us. So that's where it's at.
She has her psychotic revisionist sense of history that she insists
is correct, and I have photographic evidence that speaks otherwise.
Anyone care to see a picture of a vomit-covered book? Let me know.
I'll post it online.
Signed - ILJMMP (IL Junk
Makes ME Puke)
( respond to this story )
( I can top this )
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Working Women Don't Have Wives