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Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
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Mother-In-Law Stories
March 15, 2008
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FEBRUARY
2008
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Frequent
Fry Her TM
- IHateHer, 2 of 4 needed /Posted: 15-MAR-08
Worst gift: Worst Gift
Ever: This one isn't actually mine, but it was a gift DH received.
As a grown man, he received one of the most worthless hunks of plastic
for his birthday. Every year DH dreads his birthday, as it brings
back terrible memories. His birthday is December 19. His gifts
were always one thing, two events. They were always wrapped in
Christmas paper. So, on his 24th birthday last year, imagine his
surprise when his mother brought him a Christmas gift bag with his
birthday gift in it. This woman went to either a yard sale or the
dollar store and bought my 24 year old adult DH what we refer to
as "the most stereotypical toy in the world." It was
a car toy that moved around (not rolled) and played the song "Low
Rider". It had three people in it. The driver was a man with
a bandanna on his head and dark sunglasses. The front seat passenger
was a blonde man with a long blonde mustache (think Hulk Hogan),
wearing a teal shirt. And, last, but certainly not least, there
was a black man in the back seat of the 80's box style convertible.
He had on a black zip-up jacket and an Afro so big that they literally
didn't bother to paint eyes on for this character. So much thought.
Why didn't she just buy him a couple of Double Quarter Pounders
with Cheese? It would have cost the same!
Signed - Not The Sharpest
Crayon In The Box
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Fry Her TM
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Frequent
Fry Her TM
- IHateHer, 3 of 4 needed /Posted: 15-MAR-08
It is a baffling thought to try and put into words
everything that makes me dislike/hate my MIL. I know she may not
be the worst out there. After all, she's never tried to kill me.
BUT, she's no ideal MIL, either. So, here's a *brief* synopsis:
MIL is in her late 40's and able-bodied, but has never had a job
that lasted more than a week. She will get an application, but
never fill it out. She is convinced that no one will hire her because
she is ugly. I got a job! LOL And, she isn't living off of FIL
- they divorced when DH was 2 or 3. She is living off of her father,
who is in his late 70's. When MIL and FIL got married, around 1980,
he bought them a house (outright - no mortgage). He did it because
he felt that FIL was worthless and that his own DD would never get
a job. He felt that he had to provide them with a house. The house
was never kept clean, and when they divorced, GrandFIL stuck her
a double wide in his backyard - in a VERY upscale subdivision.
That was probably about 1986 or 87'. And, she still lives there.
She still mooches off of him. She still doesn't work. And, not
only does he pay for her shelter, lights, water, heat, etc., but
he has bought her several cars (that she has wrecked), gas money
up the wazoo, grocery money, and random sh!t She doesn't need money.
He pays her health insurance COMPLETELY out of pocket, which is
terribly expensive. She now has self-diagnosed herself with some
chronic pain disorder, and takes loads of medicine for it. She
has stolen my DH's medicine, money, and our food. She and her friends
have stolen my clothes. That still BURNS me UP! She is always
on something. She constantly sounds like she is, at the very least,
asleep. But, the truth is, she is either high, drunk, sedated,
or a combination of those. When DH and I first started dating,
I would call the house(s) - they share one phone line. His mother
would answer, and I always apologized. I thought I was waking her
up! She wanders through different unsavory "friends".
They are all, for the most part, users like her. If I had to pick
one, I would say that her crutch of choice is prescription pain
meds. MIL is an ER hopper. She visits ERs for several miles around.
She's what ER personnel refer to as a "seeker". Example:
After giving birth, I had a minor medical problem, and went to the
ER in the wee hours one Sunday morning when I could wait no longer.
She asked me which doc I saw there, and I eventually remembered
his name. I told her that he gave me an antihistamine and a steroid
pack. She said, "Oh. You should have gone on a Thursday night.
Dr. SuchandSuch is there on Thursday nights. He would have given
you something better." Oh My God! I have been married for
2 and a half years. We dated for three. I've known DH for going
on 9 years now. I could not possibly keep up with how many wrecks
this woman has had. And, they were all undoubtedly substance related.
But, was she ever prosecuted? No. And, then there was the time
the police department called my DH. He had to go pick her up because
she had taken too many pills and they didn't find her fit to drive.
She sent him on a wild goose chase, looking for a purse that she
doesn't even own. He picked her sorry @ss up, or else they would
have kept her there. It really would be a daunting task to tell
all her horror stories. I am going to get a Frequent Fryer page.
It may just meet it's quota pretty quick. She is so exhausting.
More to come on MIL from he!!.
Signed - My MIL - As
Useful As Teets On A Boar Hog
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Fry Her TM
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Frequent
Fry Her TM
- NorthernGirlSouthernHousewife, 1 of 4 needed
/Posted: 15-MAR-08
Worst gift: I know that
there are much worse gifts than those I've received over the years,
but I still felt the need to share this. On the first Christmas
I spent with DH (then BF), on the very same day that I first met
MIL, BIL and GMIL, GMIL gave us a gift. We got matching teddy bear
Christmas stockings. They were kind of cute. I was happy that
she was already giving us matching gifts. It seemed so thoughtful
and accepting of our relationship. Then, with a smile, GMIL looked
me in the eyes and said, "They're for you to use from here
on out, until you split up. Then, you'll have to fight for custody!"
The room was silent, and MIL huffed off. Apparently, it was a joke
at MIL's expense about her divorce. I guess it did teach me right
from the beginning that I was a non-person to them. If nothing
else, it gave me an interesting story.
Signed - A Joke At MIL's
Expense
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Working Women Don't Have Wives