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Worst Gifts Archive
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Worst gift:
My MIL lives in another state, which is a wonderful thing.  For Christmas a few years ago, she mailed us a card with a $25 check.  The memo on the check was, "For your Christmas Dinner, buy yourselves a pizza."  How RUDE!  Not only was I angry about her heartlessness towards me, but why do that to her son?  OR her grandchildren???  She never mentioned anything about the check.  Could it be that her embarrassment was just too much?  The check bounced!!  I have a million stories about my MIL.  I'll bet I could top any of the stories here.  It's a never-ending nightmare.
        signed - DIL of Broom Hilda

Worst gift:
My MIL gave my husband a "rent one get one free" video coupon that came on top of the pizza box for his 30th birthday.  The same year, for Christmas, I received a used cookbook with food stains in it.
        signed - Video Coupon

Worst gift:
This year I did not have to suffer the company of my MIL, as she has chosen not to have us in her life anymore.  But she did send gifts with my BIL for us.  I'm at a loss at how to word the "thank you" card.  I got a bright red pair of footsie slippers, with a dog emblazoned on each one, with rubber non-slip stamps on the bottom.  Surely everyone knows the ones I mean.  The catch to this is that, for years she told me never to buy this particular type of sock because she had broken her leg wearing a pair, and she considered them to be unsafe, in fact dangerous, to wear.  I guess I know what she thinks of me!  LOL
        signed - Merry Christmas, Break a Leg, Love -- Your MIL

RESPONSE:  Merry Christmas, Break a Leg
So, you're not sure how to word the thank you note?  Here's my advice: don't bother sending one.  Since she chooses not to have you in her life anyway, what's the difference?  Obviously you are someone above and beyond your Mil's brand of crap if you're planning to send her thank you notes for her "gifts".  For that you should be commended.  On second thought, maybe you should show her up - send her the cheesiest, ooziest, most sugar coated thank you note.  "Dear MIL ... thank you SOOOOOO much for the wonderful red slipper socks!"  If you want to let your nasty side out a little bit you can add something like, "I'll be sure to be extra careful when I wear them, because I know that they can sometimes be a little slippery."
Worst gift:
Dishwasher detergent, so she could clean my house when she came over (hint -- my house is not dirty, it is rather clean.) she would have something to use.  Insert evil sounding laugh here.  I think that says it all.
        signed - All Washed Out!!!

Worst gift:
This Christmas from my grandmother-in-law, who hasn't liked me from day one, I received a $5 gift certificate to a fast food hamburger place.  I've mentioned countless times that I absolutely CANNOT stand that place.
        signed - Don't Like Those Burgers.

Worst gift:
My future MIL gave me a three foot plastic witch that lights up when plugged in, for my birthday.  I thought it was a joke.  It is awful!!!  The only good that came out of it is the many jokes my friends get out of it.
        signed - Can't Wait 'Til Next Birthday

RESPONSE:  Can't wait 'til next birthday
Could you send the plastic witch to me?  I'd love to give it to my MIL for Mother's Day.  It sounds like the perfect gift for her.  I'm just sorry that YOU had to get such a gift from your MIL.  SHE'S the one who sounds like the true witch!!!!!!!
Worst gift:
I am 5'8" tall.  Mil gave me "petite" size sweats (she is petite, only in height though, LOL).  She always makes comments on how tall I am, and how much she wished she were taller.  Maybe she figured I shrink when I wear them?
        signed - Not Wanting A "Small" Present

RESPONSE:  Not wanting a "small" present
I know one way to lose weight.  Lose your MIL!!!  What a tacky thing, to give you small pajamas knowing they would not fit.  You should give her XXXL clothes for her birthday.  I am a big girl too, and my MIL was always sharing with me her recent clothes purchases, along with comments like, "When you lose weight, I can share this with you," or "I tried to find the same thing for you but your size is in a different department."  Gag!  Anyway, I lost about 150 lbs of MIL, and my life has never been the same.  No diets, no exercise or special TV offers.  I simply refuse to be around her.  My DH understands (the constant criticism is normal to him), but he respects my decision to have a fat-free MIL life.
RESPONSE:  response to "Not wanting a Small present"
What A B*tch.  If that were me, I wouldn't be speaking to her for a long, long while after that.  Nor would we be visiting.  Nor would we be calling.  Nor would we answer any of her calls/emails/etc.  I love my caller I.D.  I never knew it would be THIS handy (in avoiding MIL aggravation).
RESPONSE:  Not wanting a small present
Merry Christmas to you.  It is a pity people use this holiday for their own character defects.  Graciously hand her anything unacceptable right back in her lap.  You are way too big for that treatment too!
RESPONSE:  Not Wanting A "Small" Present
Don't let her get to you.  This is a classic control freak move on Mil's part.  Next present that you receive that is in a wrong size, either exchange it for the size that you need (or something better)! or donate it to a charity and take the tax write-off for yourself.  Don't even tell her about it.
RESPONSE:  Not Wanting A "Small" Present
My MIL and SIL are petite and small.  I'm nearly 6 feet tall in bare feet and am close to 200 lbs.  I have had to endure commentary on my weight, my height, my foot size, et al, ever since I first met my husband's family.  It's hopelessly rude ... even assuming I was INTERESTED in dieting.  Can anyone tell me a good way to get shorter, for heaven's sake?

I just keep reminding myself that yes, I am a bigger person in every sense then they are ... and if they get too snippy, I can snap those little bird bones without much effort.
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